Adventure Time Wiki
Adventure Time Wiki
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Hey, how's it going?

—"To Cut a Woman's Hair"

Is that true what the bird said? You guys are heroes?

Oh, I wasn't hiding. I'm a tree witch. I can turn into trees and bushes and shrubs and stuff. Check it out.

So, listen. I need you two heroes to get me a lock of princess hair.

Why? 'Cause I have a balding problem. What are you, blind? Are you blind?

Anyway, I need the princess hair so I can put it on my head, and then I'll be beautiful.

I don't mind if you have a GF.

Hey, how would you court me?

There. Now someone's in danger.

What? You forget I'm a witch?

Well, maybe you should get me some princess hair, so maybe your friend doesn't get sucked into my bottomless bottom!

Wait! You can't tell anyone why you need it.

I don't want anyone to know I have a balding problem.

I'm gonna look so beautiful... Invited to all the parties.

Ah! Quiet down! I'm daydreaming!

My cat had kittens... and I'm thinking of naming one "Little Whiner." What do you think? Is that a good name?

This isn't hair! It's bubblegum!

Well, I guess you failed. Say goodbye to your dog.

He's right. Well, don't get me wrong, I know I'm ugly... and evil.

But I thought if I had some beautiful hair, I could learn how to love myself. (sobs)

(shocked) You'd really give me your hair?

Thank you, Finn. And now to use my hair for evil.

'Cause I'm evil! (cackle, cackle) What'd you want from me?

OW! Oh, Oh... I think I fractured a branch.

—"To Cut a Woman's Hair"