This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Ketchup" from season 9, which aired on July 18, 2017.
Marceline
BMO
Finn (flashback)
Jake (flashback; non-speaking)
Lollipop Girl (flashback)
Blue Tranch (flashback)
Marceline's Mom (pictured, imagination; as Moon Lady)
Blue Jay (flashback)
Ted (flashback)
Marceline's house
Transcript[]
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Good evening, ma'am.
I just now heard that a bunch of vampires
came back to ‐‐ ooh!
I am the guy who hunts those guys.
Show me all your vampires.
All the vampires got wiped out, like, six months ago.
It's just down to me again.
Really?
I apologize for the intrusion.
Actually, I'm really glad you're here.
Hey, BMO, don't leave yet!
I need your help with something technical.
Have a sit.
Ta‐da! It's an old USB drive.
I found it in the attic, and I've been trying
to access it for weeks using my old hardware.
It's funny, but I can't even remember what's on it.
Hmm.
I don't know,
maybe you'll have more luck,
Mr. Vampire Hunter.
I also hunt data recovery!
Scanning...
[ USB drive humming, beeping ]
It's going to be a while.
A while, huh?
Let's use this opportunity to catch up.
I love ketchup! Did you make it yourself?
[ Laughs ]
BMO, no.
I mean how was your boat trip with Finn and Jake?!
Hmm...
Well, once we left Ooo...
we sailed for 100 days...
until we landed upon a small island.
We were so tired from sailing, we decided to take a nap.
Then the island started shaking and rising from the water.
We were really sleeping on a big cat
with legs on his backso he could walk upside down.
What's going on here?
He said his name was Ted.
My name is Ted.
Whoaaaaaaaa!
A big blue jay was making noise nearby.
Whoaaaa!
So we walked somewhere else.
Whoa! Oh!
Whoa! Whoa!
We saw some boats in the clouds.
Finn sang a song, even though he was asleep.
♪ I want to ride on a boat, boat, boat ♪
♪ I want to ride on a goat, goat, goat ♪
♪ Middle C is my favorite note, note, note ♪
♪ I'm on a cat that floats, floats, floats ♪
Then we floated with the boats ‐‐
not in the boats, but with the boats.
And we disappeared into the clouds.
That's how I remember it,
though I might have embellished.
So, what did you do while I was on my trip?
Huh?
That was awesome, BMO.
What are you making?
Puppets!
Oh, my blogs!
You are going to catch me up with a puppet story?
Yup! You gave me the idea!
I'm so happy right now!
I'll try to make it interesting ‐‐ the BMO way.
Once there was this...
lollipop girl.
Princess Bubblegum?
So there was this lollipop girl.
She was really sweet...
and really smart.
Her best friend was...
rock star girl.
[ Guitar strums ]
'Nuff said.
They were pretty different,
but they grokked each other.
They lived on a giant birthday cake
called Weekend City, where clocks were illegal
and everyone was chill as heck.
[ Horn toots ]Ha ha! Hey!
Ha ha! Hey!
♪ You don't need a pill to be chill ♪
♪ Just have a dill pickle ♪
♪ Go get tickled ♪
♪ And do not kill ♪
Hey, my page!
♪ I'm gonna go pee ♪
♪ Sorry ♪
But one day, a mysterious, cold fart
brought the evil blue tranch into town.
Ha‐ha!
Hey, there!
Hi. You seem like you'd be into fulfilling
your evolutionary potential by becoming a potato‐head.
Am I right or am I right?
Remember that clocks were illegal in Weekend City.
Well, today's your lucky day...
'cause I'm offering this magic fertilizer.
Whoo!
Marceline: Lollipop girl turned her down cold.
[ Growls ] I'll never get these normies
to understand what they're missing.
To be pure potato.
Pure tattoo.
Marceline: And so, unwilling to give up her bad plan...
[ Laughing ]
Marceline: The blue tranch crop‐dusted the whole town,[ Cloud farts ]
turning everyone into potato‐heads!
[ Coughing ]
Huh?[ Sniffs ]
Ew![ Screams ]
Marceline: But lollipop girl got it the worst.
Her potato was growing potatoes on potatoes.
She was turning into a full‐on potato‐stack ‐‐
and I mean crazy tall.
How tall?
Mmm...12 giants tall.
Oh! That is even taller than when PB got tall.
[ Clears throat ]
Anyways...
Rock star girl was tough.
She fought back the curse.
♪♪
She promised lollipop girl she would save her.
She travelled all the way to Potato Town
to confront the blue tranch.
[ Screams ]
♪ Hey, Blue TranchI'll give you one chance ♪
♪ To fix my friend. Or I'll kick your pants ♪
♪ La la la la la la la la ♪
Stop!
I have migraines!
It turned out the blue tranch's head
was too dense to appreciate good music.
So rock star girl kicked her pants with songs.
♪ Kicks, kicks, kicks. Take that and take this ♪
Until, finally, the tranch gave up the antidote.
There! Are you happy now?!
Yes! You go, rock star girl!
But now it gets sad.
Oh, no. Why?
Well...
Rock star girl wasn't really sure
if the blue tranch gave her the real antidote...
or if it was just a trick to get rid of her.
But the potato curse had started to spread faster,
so it was kind of her only shot.
Rock star girl used her last bit of strength
to climb the potato stalk.
But when she finally reached the top, she discovered...
[ Gasps ]
That lollipop girl
was a completely different person.
Ha, ha! No!
Rock star girl was heart‐broken.
All she'd wanted was to have her best friend back,
but she was gone.
As the potato curse consumed her final thoughts,
she decided to brace her fate...
to ‐‐ to explode into stardust!
[ Strums guitar ]
- Marceline: The end.
What?!Okay.
But she was you, right?
If that's how you interpreted it.
That ending...
was not believable.
Come on. You had a cat with legs on its back.
I was being emotionally truthful.
Fine. I sort of copped out.
I guess I just got some stuff that's harder to talk about.
Maybe 'cause I never actually talked about it for real ‐‐
not even to myself.
[ Bell dings ]
Pancakes are ready!
Oh.
[ Whirs ]
Burp.
So what's on the drive?
I will show you.
♪♪
[ Gasps ]BMO, pause slide show!
Mom.
Marceline?
Who's the nice lady and the little girl?
It's um...
I don't know, Beems.
Why don't you tell me a story
about the little girl and the nice lady.
Okay!
Once there was a lady who lived in the moon.
She was called Moon Lady, and she could only come out during lunar eclipses.
Once there was a little girl playing alone by the sea.
"Hello, little girl."
"Who are you?"
"I'm the moon lady," said the Moon Lady.
They became best friends.
They swam in the dirty ocean water,
rolled down a hill on a giant beach ball,
played "can you catch me?"
And rode horses or something.
They had so much fun.
But, soon, the eclipse started to vanish...
and the moon lady had to say good‐bye...
because eclipses can't last forever.
But the little girl never forgot the moon lady.
Or their friendship.
I think I've heard a story like that...
a long, long time ago.
[ Sniffles ]
That was beautiful, BMO.
Well, it's a beautiful picture.