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This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Her Parents" from season 2, which aired on January 24, 2011.

Tree Fort
This transcript is complete. Only minor edits are needed.


Jake: You want some more eggs, BMO?
BMO: Yes, please.
Jake: [Gives BMO more eggs] How 'bout you, Finny? Need a refill?
Finn: I'm pretty full, man... but lemme see if I can... rearrange. [Tries to move food in his stomach but fails] Nope. Can't do it.
Jake: I don't know if stomachs work like that, dude.
Finn: Sometimes it helps.
Jake: Can't argue with that! [Relaxes] Ahh...
Finn: [Relaxing] Ahh...
BMO: [Moving arms up] Ahh...
[Telephone rings and Jake groans.]
Jake: [Answering] Hello? Lady, it's gonna be fine. Mm-hmm. Alright, I love you, too. Bye. [Hangs up]
Finn: Lady Rainicorn again?
Jake: Yeah, man. She's worried about introducing me to her parents at lunch today. She thinks they're gonna freak out.
Finn: Um... maybe give her parents some treasure?
Jake: No way! That's our treasure! Wait. I've got it, dude! I'll invite them over early, smooth them over using my personality, and we'll all be best friends before Lady gets here so she doesn't have to feel nervous! It's perfect! I'll just send them a quick Prism-gram. [Begins writing] Mm-hmm. [He finishes and sends the message. The reply comes within seconds.]
Finn: What's it say?
Jake: Hold on. It's still converting the light waves into brain waves. [The crystal shoots a beam into his head.] Ahh... They're into it, dude!
Finn: Sweet! Let's go powder our noses!
[Scene shifts to Finn and Jake's bedroom.]
Finn: Why's Lady so nervous, anyway?
Jake: Well... she didn't really say, but it might have somethin' to do with the Rainicorn-Dog Wars.
Finn: There were wars between rainicorns and dogs?
Jake: Horrifying wars. For thousands of years, rainicorns battled dogs over territory in the Crystal Dimension... but Lady and I are cool.
Finn: Dude! Her parents are probably all full of dog-hatred from the war-times! They're gonna see you're a dog and forbid Lady from ever hanging out with you again!
Jake: ...Nah. That could never happen.
Finn: You didn't think this through enough... IT COULD HAPPEN!!
Finn: Don't worry. I've got a plan that's gonna solve this biz. Homies help homies. Always.
Jake: I'm ready to hear your plan, homie.
[Finn whispers to Jake; in the next scene they can be seen painting the treasure room and singing The Decorating Song, while Jake morphs himself into a rainicorn.]
Finn: Haha, yeah! This plan is perfect!
Jake: You know, I thought painting ourselves rainbow-color using condiments and stuff from the fridge so we could pretend to be rainicorns was a good idea when you pitched it to me five minutes ago, but now I'm not so sure, man.
Finn: Come ooonnn. Trust me, homie.
Jake: [Worried] No, no, no, new plan. First, we're gonna clean this place up, and then— [Doorbell rings] Huh?!
Ethel: Jake?
[Bob rings the doorbell two more times, then he and his wife look at each other.]
Bob: [Knocking] Hello? [they have universal translators]
Jake: 안녕하세요. ("Hello.")
Ethel: Jake, is that you?
Jake: Uh-huh.
Ethel: Are you going to let us in?
Jake: Y-yeeeaaah... [Opens door]
Jake: I can explain!! I can explain!!
Ethel: OOOHHHHH, he's so handsome! Oh, Bob, our daughter's finally found a handsome rainicorn to love!
Jake: You think I'm a rainicorn?
Bob: I think we can spot a member of our own species, Jake. We're not blind.
Ethel: Well, we are a little blind.
Bob: Yes, I guess we are a little blind.
Jake: Uh, well, hey! Come on in! It's awesome to finally meet you both!
Ethel: Your house is very colorful. I like that!
Finn: [Whispering to Jake] Haha! The plan is working, homie!
Bob: Jake, what is that thing that's talking?
Jake: Uh... that's um...
Finn: I'm Jake's rainicorn roommate! Everyone do the traditional rainicorn rain dance! [Starts chanting and dancing]
Bob: Jake, please ask your goblin butler to stop insulting my heritage!
Jake: Uh... y-yes! [To Finn] Get outta here, goblin! Go fetch us some rainicorn snacks!
Finn: But—
Jake: [Whispering] Come on, homie, help me!
Finn: [Smiles] [Whispering] Ha! You got it, homie!
Jake: Uh... please, c-come upstairs.
[Scene shifts to the living room.]
Jake: My goblin will bring us snacks in a moment.
Bob: Thank you, Jake. I'm glad the wife and I made the trip from the Crystal Dimension.
Ethel: Yes, we're eager to know more about the studly young rainicorn that's dating our daughter.
Bob: Ethel...
Jake: Well, ask me whatever you like, Ethel, Bob!
Ethel: I am a little curious about your goblin. He looks a little odd.
Jake: Well... he's actually a human.
Ethel: Oh, Bob! Our future-son-in-law must be filthy-rich to afford a human butler!
Bob: Shh. [To Jake] Thank you, Jake, for being interested in our daughter!
Jake: Uh... No problem, Bob!
Ethel: Oh! Let's play some traditional rainicorn games!
Bob: Jake, do you know Cameladabalawabapp? [Note: the name is pronounced with blowing a small raspberry at the end.]
Jake: Uh, s-say it again?
Bob: Cameladabalawabapp!
Jake: Ohhhh! [Laughs] Cablatapuamba—[Blows raspberry]! I thought you said "Kabloderaga—[Blows raspberry]"! [Chuckles] Ah, man, I love gettin' down and dirty with some Cablatapuamba—[Blows raspberry]! Ha! Y'all should go first, though.
Bob: Hmm. Bold move letting your opponent move first, Jake. I respect that. Very well. Cameladabalawabapp!! [Fires a beam from his horn at the wall, which turns red.]
Ethel: Oh, Bob!
Bob: Haha! Your turn, Jake!
Jake: I...
Finn: [Entering] Snacks! Get your snacks!
Jake: [To himself] Finn! [Whispering to him] Dude! I have to show Lady's parents that I have rainbow powers! I need homie help!
Finn: Hmm... I got a plan, bro-ham. Just stretch your horn at me, and I'll take care of the rest.
Jake: You're the best, homie.
Finn: Homies help homies.
Jake: Haha! [He steps back and Finn breathes in and holds his breath, then gives a thumbs-up.] Cablatapuamba—[Blows raspberry]!
[Jake stretches his "horn" at Finn. Finn's face begins to turn red from holding his breath. Finn falls over and releases his breath. Ethel and Bob applaud Jake.]
Ethel: Very unusual color palette, Jake.
Bob: Yes. Subtle.
Jake: Whoo! Oh, yeah! [Finn is breathing heavily on the floor.] Finn?
Bob: How about we play some more traditional rainicorn games, my boy?
Jake: I, uh... Oh. Um... let's do it!
Bob and Ethel: Let the games begin!
[Musical montage begins. Bob and Ethel begin flying. Jake "flies" by having Finn carry him.]
Jake: [Whispering to Finn] I'm sorry.
[Finn scowls. Next, Ethel, Bob, and Jake wrestle with their horns. Ethel charges into Finn from behind and knocks him down; she and Bob laugh. Finn looks at Jake who just shrugs helplessly. Next, Finn is places on a coiled-up Ethel, who suddenly juts out like a spring, sending Finn flying off into a glass bottle. Bob places Finn on a coiled-up Jake who does the same, reluctantly. Finn falls through the ceiling of the living room in the Tree Fort.]
Jake: [To the parents] Yo, my bad! I'll get 'im! [Jake enters the fort panting.] Hey, man. How's it goin'?
Finn: [Angry] IT'S "GOING" CRUD-COW!
Jake: I know, I know, I'm sorry. But they really like me. Your plan is working perfectly!
Finn: Being poked in the buns and laughed at was not in my plan! Not in the plan!
Jake: Look, Finn, you know I got yo back fo'-eva', but right now, you're the only one who can help me. Come on, homie. [He smiles at Finn who is still making an angry face.] Homies help homies. [Finn smiles.] [Ethel and Bob enter laughing.] Hey, guys. You ready to get this game goin' again?
Ethel: Oh, no, we're pooped.
Bob: Yeah, we're about ready to break out our picnic basket and dig in!
Jake: Wohhh, no. You're my guests. Let me take care of you. [Whispering to Finn] Homie... help me cook something, please.
Finn: ...Okay.
Jake: Thanks, Finn. [To Ethel and Bob] Okay. Don't worry about a thing. Finn'll make a great lunch. He's a little raw, but he's got great taste.
Bob: What?! Wow! So wealthy, and so generous!
Ethel: Ah! I was hoping! [Laughs] I was afraid to ask!
[Ethel and Bob gather around Finn. Bob rips off Finn's shirt.]
Finn: WAAAH! Jake!! I think they wanna eat me!!
Ethel: Of course we do! Jake said you'd "make a great lunch"!
Jake: [Panicking] Man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man....
[Bob bites Finn's stomach.]
Finn: AAAH! Knock it off, Bob!! [Punches him]
Ethel: [Punching Finn] Don't you touch him!!
[The three continue fighting.]
Jake: Come on, stop it, guys! Come on, y'all, I said stop! [Growls angrily then grows huge] NOW, THAT'S ENOUGH!!! Nobody's eating Finn!! He's not my butler, and he's not food! Finn is my friend! [Ethel and Bob gasp.] I'm sorry I let the lies get so far outta hand. I just got so scared of losing Lady! [To himself] But if they hate me, so be it. No more lies. [Retracts to his default form]
Ethel: [Gasps] You're a dog?
Jake: Yeah, I just... [Groans] Look, I'm sorry about everything. I was—
[Ethel and Bob celebrate by singing "The Lucky Ones," dancing, and hugging Jake.]
Jake: Uh... uh... [Gasps] Lady?!
Lady Rainicorn: 어, 나도 우리 부모님 때문에 걱정했었어! 우리 엄마아빠는 개라면 완전 맛이 가거든! 개가 전쟁터에서 우리 아빠 생명을 구해줬었어! ("Oh, I was worried about my parents! My mom and dad are crazy about dogs! A dog saved my dad in the war!")
Finn: What did she say?
Jake: She said she worried that they'd freak out... 'cause her parents are bananas for dogs!
Finn: J.J. FLIP! What the zip?!
[Lady hands Finn a photo.]
Jake: Yeah! She says a dog saved her dad in the war!
Finn: Wow! That's flippin' awesome.
[Scene shifts to outside the fort. Everyone is having a picnic.]
Ethel: Finn.
Finn: [Stops staring at his food] ...Wha?
Ethel: Listen, I just want you to know how sorry we are about... trying to eat you.
Bob: It's just we thought we'd never get another chance. We thought humans were extinct.
Finn: Oh.
Jake: So... this isn't human?
Ethel: Oh, no. This is soy people!
Finn: Oh.
Ethel: I've never tasted real human before, but they say you can't even tell the difference!
[Finn touches his food, which begins to secrete a strange liquid.]
Jake: Ew... Soy? [Eats some and smiles] FINN, YOU'RE DELICIOUS!
[Finn disconcertedly watches the rest of the group eat. He stares at his food and cautiously puts some of it in his mouth. He smiles and the episode ends.]