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This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Elemental" from season 8, which aired on May 19, 2016.

This transcript is Incomplete


Starchy: Honey I'm home! Oops. I forgot I lived alone. Well, no bother. I won the Golden Shovel Award. [turns on the light] Candy Kingdom's premier award for grave-digging excellence. There. Now to hang up my tuxedo so it doesn't wrinkle. [gasps, discovers that hangers in his closet are missing]
[Banana Guard picks up the phone]
Banana Guard #1: You're missing hangers, too?
Banana Guard #2: Well, I don't really use hangers.
Banana Guard #1: Have you considered folding? We better call Princess Bubblegum.
[Princess Bubblegum pauses the recorded video]
Princess Bubblegum: And then I called you guys.
Finn: To find all the wire hangers?
Jake: Wouldn't you rather have us fighting evil demons or something?
Princess Bubblegum: Maybe an evil demon is stealing all the hangers.
Jake: Hmm.
Jake: [shapeshifted as a trashcan] See anything?
Finn: [inside Jake] No, it's pretty quite out there.
Jake: Yeah, but not so much in here.
Finn: Huh? What does that mean?
[Jake farts]
Finn: Oh, Jake, no!
[Jake laughs]
Finn: Wait, hold on.
[Ice King tries to break and enter "C. K. Dry Cleaners"]
Jake: It's over, Ice King!
Ice King: Oh, hi, guys.
Finn: What's going on? Is kidnapping hangers your new thing now?
Jake: Yeah, man, you have, like, one muumuu, and you're wearing it.
Ice King: You think this is about hangers? Really?
Finn: Well... Yeah, because you're stealing all the hangers.
Jake: You're stealing everyone's hangers, dude.
Ice King: It's about so much more! Come back to my place, and I'll explain everything.
Finn and Jake: Hmm.
Ice King: See? I dropped my keys down this deep hole. I need all these hanger guys to help me snag 'em. When I'm done, I'll return them all, and that's an ice promise.
Finn: How long has this crack been here?
Ice King: Forever. Before forever. What the... [pulled down to the crack by hanger] Oh! Something's got me!
Finn: Let go of the hanger!
Ice King: Huh?
Jake: Let go!
Ice King: Oh.
Jake: This calls for an investigation.
Ice King: All right. Stand back! [forms a circular saw with the power of his ice magic] Follow me, fellas!
[Finn, Jake and Ice King keeps walking down through the tunnel while Ice King drills ahead]
Ice King: Watch your heads.
[Ice thuds]
Ice King: Holy moly! Do you know what this extra square footage means when I decide to sell?
Finn: [looks into the icy orb]There's something in here.
Jake: What is it?
Finn: I don't know.
Ice King: Well, no rest for the sexy.
Jake: That's not the expression.
[Ice King drills against the surface of the orb]
Ice King: Boy, this is strong. A lot stronger than my ice. [grunts]
[Orb cracks, and explodes]
Patience St. Pim: [gasps] Dudes!
Finn: Hello.
Patience St. Pim: What year is this?
Finn: Uh, nobody really keeps time like that.
Patience St. Pim: It worked! I mean, I feel like it worked. This is the future, right?
Finn: Who are you? You're like a beautiful Ice King.
Jake: Oh, boy, here we go.
Ice King: Back off, son! I saw her first!
Patience St. Pim: Chill, you guys. [chuckles] "Chill"? Get it? I'm Patience St. Pim, the ICE ELEMENTAL! Whoo! [sprays icy particles] Did you see that? I made ice... with my hands.
Finn: I'm Finn the human, and this is Jake the dog.
Jake: Hello.
Patience St. Pim: Who's a good boy?
Ice King: Ahem. They call me the Ice King. I also make ice. [tiny ice pops out from Ice King's finger]
Finn: He's been using his powers a lot today.
Patience St. Pim: [jumps off the boat] Hup! Well, I think you're pretty groovy. Do you wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna be my acolyte?
Ice King: Sure. What's that? Like a boyfriend?
Patience St. Pim: More like an intern.
Ice King: Oh.
Patience St. Pim: Uh, no, you're right. It is more like a boyfriend.
Ice King: Cool.
Patience St. Pim: YOU'RE COOL! Dialed in, you know?
Ice King: [chuckles] Huh, what?
Patience St. Pim: Yeah. Uh, hey, this might be a weird question, but do you know where the slime, candy, and fire dudes are?
Finn: [whispers]She's talking about the princesses.
Jake: [whispers]I'm starting to get a weird feeling.
Ice King: Oh, you must mean Slime Princess, Princess Bubblegum, and Flame Princess.
Patience St. Pim: [intrigued]Princesses?
Ice King: We're like this!
Patience St. Pim: That is so fun. Okay now, this next request may sound super sketch.
Ice King: Okay.
Patience St. Pim: I need you to round them up and bring them back here. Like, even if they don't want to come. You think you could do that?
Ice King: Are you kidding? That's in my wheelhouse, right up my alley! Classic Ice King.
Patience St. Pim: So, wait, is it in your wheelhouse or up your alley?
Ice King: Classic Ice King.
Finn: Hold on a minute. You can't make Simon start kidnapping princesses again.
Jake: Yeah, he's semi-reformed.
Patience St. Pim: Excuse me for a second, boyfriend.
Finn: Okay Jake---
[Finn and Jake are immobilized instantly with Patience St. Pim's ice power, then Patience St. Pim carves Finn and Jake's respective initials on the ice orb capturing them]
Ice King: Wow, you got their initials on there, and look at those shapes. We're kind of like a power couple.
Patience St. Pim: Get me those princesses.
Ice King: You got it, boss.

ā™Ŗā™Ŗ

[ Humming ]

Huh?


Send me a postcard when you get there.

[ Chuckles ]

Hey.

Aagh!

Ice King!I'm gonna ā€ā€

Hold that thought.

[ Sighs ]


[ Gasps ]


Aw, nice work, hon.Thanks.

The pink one,how old is she?

Like 18, 19?

Uh, yeah, sort of.

Ha.I remember being 18.

I'm 28.[ Gags ]

Okay,I want to talk to them.

Allow me!

[ Soft guitar music plays ]

Hmm.

Gotta be careful.

All right, out of the way,Bernini.


Are you guys okay?


[ Grunts ]

I need to lie down.

Oh, I'm fine.

[ Growls ]

Finn and Jake?!

Ice King, what did you do?!

No, no, no! It was her!

Get our guests some beverages.

Hi, guys.

I know this is weird and confusing and weird, but the good news is I'm getting the band back together!

Isn't this great?

What are you talking about?

You really don't know?


That was pretty cool, right?

I made this ice chair with my hands.

Pretty chill, huh?

[ Sarcastically ]Yeah. So chill.

The fact of the matter is you guys have that power,as well.


Okay, remember when I said I was the ice elemental?

Remember?

Oh, no, wait, that was those guys!

[ Chuckling ] I told those guys,not you guys.

Those guys! Oh!

Okay, um, this is like basic elemental history, okay, so just listen up.[ Chuckles ]


Ever since life began on this planet,

there have always been embodiments

of the four elements ā€ā€

Fire, ice, candy, and slime.

Across eons and millennia,

the four elementals lived and died and lived again.

I was the incarnation

of the ice elemental back in the day.

And you guys were there, too.

[ Door creaks, bell jingles ]

We used to get coffee sometimes.

It was a nonā€magic world back then, so our powers were limited.

But as we gatheredmore and more,

we began to see visions ā€ā€

visions of the future.

The world was about to go through a transition,

"an epic cataclysm that we probably wouldn't survive."

It was scaryto think about perishing.

But then I was like,"Hey, what if we don't perish?

What if I freeze us and we waitout this transition?"

But the old versions of y'allweren't into it.

Said, "You accepted

that the elementsyou embodied would live on."

Said I was in denialor something.

So I went out aloneand froze myself.

And all of you bit it.



But now you're back!

And this worldis crazy, right?

You got weird old wizardsand talking dogs.

Yo, dogs didn't used to talk.Did you know that?!



Back then,we were so stifled.

At last, we can unlockour true potential!

[ Laughing ]



[ Chuckling ]

Did I mentiony'all were dudes in the past?

This is so much better!

Totally!

[ Screaming ]



[ Grunts ]

[ Laughing ]Your face right now!

Oh, no!

I gotta get a picture of this.

Oh, wait.I need my charger.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!



Food!



What a surprise!

It's a billion years laterand you're still not cool.

Ladies,please don't fight.

There's enough Ice Kingto go around.



[ Gurgles ]

Patience:I'm done hiding out.

Everybody out thereis gonna know me soon.



[ Screams ]

[ Grunts ]

[ Screams ]

Woof.

Let's get out of here.

She's not going anywherefor a while.



Hey, I been there,sister.



What are you doing?

[ Muffled ]Helping.

Just scrape itonto the ground.

Oh, sorry.

I freeze myselffor the future

out of the goodnessof my heart,

and they, like,shoot slime at me?

Whatever.

I don't need their approval.

I'm gonna startsome crazy biz, man.

Just watch.



My keys!

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