This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Blenanas" from season 10, which aired on March 18, 2018.
Music
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This transcript is complete.
Transcript[]
- [The episode opens in the Tree Fort's treasure room. Finn is reading the note Jake left at the end of the last episode.]
- Finn: "B.R.B. - Jake". Hmm. B.R.B... B.R.B. Bring regular babies. Big red balls. No. Beautiful rump burger.
- [BMO enters down the ladder into the treasure room, carrying a banana.]
- BMO: What you doing, Finn?
- Finn: Jake left me this note, but I, uh [tuts] I can't remem what the abbreve means.
- BMO: [Gasps] It's for me! This is Jake's special code to tell me he loves me.
- Finn: No, it's something normal like, uh...
- BMO: Be right back. [He walks away.]
- Finn: Right! "Be right back!" [Laughs] So dumb. Cool. Jake'll be right back.
- [There is a thud, and Finn looks over to BMO. BMO has produced a box of papers from a bookshelf in a nearby treasure pile.]
- BMO: Look, Finn! My Jake Valentines. He leaves them for me when he goes out.
- [The box contains various notes from Jake.]
- Finn: That's cute, BMO.
- BMO: Yeah, I know.
- [Finn spots an issue of Ble magazine that fell on BMO's head while he was retrieving the box.]
- Finn: Oh, Ble. I love Ble! [Taking the magazine] I'll read some Ble 'til Jake gets back, I guess.
- [BMO laughs and giggles at one of the notes. Finn sits on a massage chair and begins reading the magazine. He chuckles as he turns the pages.]
- Finn: [Reading out loud] "What's your favorite food?" "Anything! As long as it's made of cheese!" [Laughs] Aw, man, these comics are like if someone put my soul on a page. [Turns the page where there is an illustration of a saber-toothed cat biting a caveman while a doctor writes on a clipboard.] Hmm? "You write the caption." Okay! Hmm. [Thinks of something and laughs to himself, taking a pen from his backpack to begin writing.] "Ouch! Hey, this isn't helping." [Chuckles] Yeah. [Calling out] Ja - I mean, BMO!
- [BMO is sat on the floor, pretending to make the banana and one of Jake's notes kiss each other.]
- Finn: Check this funny caption I just wrote.
- BMO: Hmm. [He begins beeping and his faceplate reads "scanning humor", then turns into an exclamation point.] No humor detected.
- Finn: What? No, it's - it's like... this guy's problem is a tiger biting his foot, and talking to this guy isn't helping! Like, "Ouch! Hey, this isn't helping!" You know, like, it's, you know, like...
- BMO: Was the tiger already biting his foot? Or did the tiger bite his foot after he lay down on the couch? Because that is the bearded man's responsibility.
- Finn: BMO, I love you, but you don't understand comedy.
- BMO: Maybe it's just not funny.
- Finn: [Gasps] This is funny, and I'm gonna prove it!
- BMO: You are?
- Finn: Yeah, I mean, I'm pretty bored, and this is really funny, BMO.
- BMO: [Shouting] Prove it!
- Finn: [Angrily] Fine! I'm going to!
- BMO: Fine! [Squashes the banana.] I'll be right here!
- Finn: Fine!
- BMO: Fine!
- [Finn slams the door, then smiles and waves at BMO through the window. BMO smirks and waves back. They were both just pretending to be angry. The scene changes to the Candy Kingdom, where Princess Bubblegum is riding through the streets on a hoverboard wearing a siren hat and carrying a laser gun and a megaphone.]
- Princess Bubblegum: Bwee-woo-bwee-woo! This is a drill! [She shoots a house with her laser gun and the wall explodes.] I repeat, this is a drill! [She shoots another house.]
- Candy people: Oh no! A real drill?!
- Princess Bubblegum: You two, raise your resinous glaze shields! [She shoots at the two candy people and the house behind them explodes. Several seconds too late, they lift up a pane of shielding that was supposed to defend against the shot.]
- Candy people: Oh, oh, oh, oh!
- Princess Bubblegum: Activate the B.H.T. to preserve freshness!
- [A Gumball Guardian pulls a lever and a green force field descends across the whole kingdom. Bubblegum looks at her watch.]
- Princess Bubblegum: We're not ready.
- Candy people: Intruder! Intruder! It's our friend, Finn!
- [Finn enters, escorted by two candy people holding his hands.]
- Finn: What's all the hubbub, Bubs?
- Princess Bubblegum: Oh, just some precautionary exercises in case our primary alarm and defense system fails.
- Finn: Cool. Cool. Hey, can you look at this funny thing I wrote?
- Princess Bubblegum: Oh, sure! I'm fascinated by humor. [Finn hands her the comic and she puts on her glasses to read it.] Hmm! Yes. Certainly what this hirsute gentleman needs is a tetanus shot. Excellent point, Finn.
- Finn: No, but... is it funny? Never mind.
- Princess Bubblegum: I don't have time to explain the psychology of humor to you. [She picks up a baseball bat, smashes the front window of a nearby bookstore, and takes a book.] But I'd like you to read this book.
- Kenneth: [Emerging from the bookstore] Hey, what do you think you're - Oh! Princess Bubblegum! [Bubblegum hands him the bat.] Thank you, Princess.
- Princess Bubblegum: Der Witz Und Seine Beziehung Zum Unterbewussten. "The Joke and his Relation to the Unconscious". It's printed in Gebrochene Schrift, which I think is easier on the eyes.
- [The scene changes. Finn is walking through the forest with the book.]
- Finn: "Der Witz Und... Der Witz Und... See-einy... Bezeyhung... Zumbewuzzzz..." Ugh! PB's too smart. That's why she doesn't get my joke. I mean... it's funny. [He sits on a tree root and takes out the comic.] It's funny. "Ouch, hey this isn't-" [Chuckles] "This isn't helping." [Snickers] Uh, it's super funny. Turbo-nerds like PB just aren't the right audience for this sort of thing, you know? I should show this to normal people, the common folk. The busy woman on the go. The regular Joe or Josephine. Or somebody like Ice King, who's desperate for my approval.
- [The scene changes to the Ice Kingdom, where Ice King is reading the comic.]
- Ice King: [Laughing] Finn, this is so funny! A kitty with big teeth?! Come on!
- Finn: [Chuckles] Yeah, I didn't draw that, but cool. Well, thanks for-
- Ice King: Oh, yeah. But, uh, what if - and I'm just spitballin'. What if it was something more like, "Hey, Doc! I got a caveman in my teeth!" Huh?
- [A group of penguins quack in approval of the joke.]
- Ice King: Haha! Whoo!
- Finn: Heh. Yeah. That's pretty good, I guess.
- Ice King: Oh, is this Ble? I love Ble! That one with the two cops who are always accidentally arresting each other.
- Finn: Right?! And "Animal Quackers"!
- Ice King: I've been mailing them my short stories and comics for as long as I can remember. But, uh, nary a piece published. Nary a piece. [Suddenly angry.] Nary a piece! I hate Ble! Sittin' in their ivory towers! They don't know comedy! They don't understand the common folk! The busy woman on the go!
- Ice King and Finn: [Together] The average Joe or Josephine! Right!
- Ice King: See? We got the goods, you and I, and they've lost their touch. Hey, if we want them to touch our goods, we should go down there and confront them face-to-face.
- Finn: And if I get my winning caption printed, everybody will know it's funny! I'm talking about you, BMO. But, uh, where do they print Ble?
- Ice King: Oh, yeah. I don't, uh... Oh! Oh! Yeah, hold this. I'll use my... demonic wishing eye!
- [The two of them are transported to a strange dimension with fluffy clouds and rainbows.]
- Wishy: Hello, Ice King.
- Ice King: Hello, Wishy!
- Wishy: What do you like to wish for?
- Ice King: I wish to go to Ble!
- Wishy: You go, girl!
- [Wishy fires a beam of magic at Finn and Ice King. They scream as they are transported to the Ble headquarters.]
- Finn: Whoa. Why don't you just use that thing all the time?
- Ice King: Oh, it takes a piece of your soul each time you use it. But look! The legendary Bledquarters!
- Finn: It must be so fun to work here, just sittin' around, making up jokes all day.
- [They approach the bridge leading to the front door.]
- Pudding Troll: Hey! Hey.
- Finn: Aww. Who are you?
- Pudding Troll: I'm a pudding troll, and I guard this humor magazine.
- Finn: Uhhhh, why?
- Pudding Troll: It's... my job.
- Finn: Why is this your job?
- Pudding Troll: I... applied? I'm maybe not following you. I think I better escort you off the premises.
- Finn: No! No, no, no. We just want to pitch a cartoon caption!
- Pudding Troll: [Speaking to the second face on his belly.] Hey, Big Tina, it's your time to shine, okay?
- [The Pudding Troll shoots a blast of pudding at Finn and Ice King. They both scream. Finn pushes back against the pudding but is swept off his feet.]
- Finn: Waahh!
- [Ice King is rapidly trying to eat the pudding as Finn washes up beside him.]
- Finn: Okay, what's our plan here?
- Ice King: Maybe if we eat all this ammo, he'll be forced to make more for us.
- Finn: Wait. You can fly!
- Pudding Troll: Uh-oh! Angle up, Big Tina!
- [Ice King is carrying Finn through the air. He laughs before being taken out by a blast of pudding. Finn falls towards the Pudding Troll.]
- Pudding Troll: Uh-oh! Ugh!
- [Finn tackles the Pudding Troll to the ground and pins him.]
- Pudding Troll: You win. Fine. I've never let anyone inside before, so I hope you have an amazing pitch.
- [The Pudding Troll opens the front door and a pile of letters spills out onto the street.]
- Ice King: Hey! These are all my submissions! They kept them in a big pile by the door... Seems like a good sign!
- [They enter the building. Dozens of long-dead skeletons are sat at the desks and strewn across the floor.]
- Finn: Well, shoot, man. Looks like everyone here is crazy dead.
- Pudding Troll: I've been guarding dead people for five hundred years. Wow, I need to sit with that.
- Finn: This means that Ble Magazine is dead, too! [He sits on a skeletons lap at one of the desks.] Now how am I supposed to prove my caption's funny.
- Ice King: Ding dong! I found Ble 217! We can see what the winning caption was.
- Finn: [Reading] "I'm going to write you a prescription for one giant club." [Scoffs]
- Ice King: It's about time us young guns took the reins.
- [Ice King throws a monitor out the window then blows on a conch shell. The sound reaches the Ice Kingdom, where a large group of penguins hear it and make their way to the Ble headquarters, quacking as they go. They burst through the front door of the building, scattering Ice King's submissions.]
- Ice King: Hello, boys. Now let's roll these presses one last time.
- [A montage plays. The penguins are seen working at desks and helping to organise Ice King's submissions. Finn and the Pudding Troll work on new comics. Finn draws "Hat Dog" and adds a second hat, which they are both satisfied with. The penguins operate the presses, and with a hiss, the new issue of the magazine is produced. Finn staples the spine.]
- Finn: Our very own Ble Magazine.
- Ice King: And it's a pretty good issue, too. We got that nice cover you did, my short story, "Fionna and Cake: Baby Detectives", some, looks like, pudding jokes...
- Pudding Troll: Big Tina wrote those!
- Ice King: ..."Fionna and Cake: Baby Detectives Go to College", and, of course, your caption!
- Finn: Wow. It looks amazing in print.
- Pudding Troll: Guys, I'm gonna be honest, just speaking as an average Josephine, I really don't get that caption.
- Finn: Maybe it doesn't matter if my caption is funny or not. I think I just wanted to be part of Ble. It's something I've been a fan of for so long. And maybe we can bring it back. There's no reason it can't have a new dawn. A Blennaissance!
- Ice King: Okay, boys, close her down!
- [The penguins begin violently destroying all the computers and presses, and set fire to the building.]
- Finn: [Shouting over the destruction] No, you're right. Can't be nostalgic!
- [The scene changes. Finn is walking back towards the Tree Fort.]
- Finn: Man, that caption was amazing in my head. Maybe I'm not a very funny person. Like, I got low comedy stats. That's kind of a bummer.
- [BMO is in the treasure room, humming to himself and drawing a picture on the side of Neptr. Finn enters.]
- Finn: Yo, BMO. Check it out! I got Ble to publish my caption, even though I don't need you to think I'm funny anymo-
- [Finn comedically slips on four banana peels in a row, slides across the room screaming, rips his pants, trips over a pile of treasure, flies through the air, and slams face first into the massage chair, which tips over and activates while Finn is stuck upside down in his underwear. BMO and Neptr both laugh uncontrollably. Finn smiles.]
Episode ends