This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Beyond this Earthly Realm" from season 4, which aired on June 11, 2012.

This transcript is complete.


[The episode begins with Finn and Jake spelunking in a cave. Jake yawns making a sound similar to Chewbacca from Star Wars.]
Jake: Man... let's go home.
Finn: Nuts to that. I wanna find a mystery cave.
Jake: [Sighs] But, Finn, I'm gettin' all cranky around my joke-hole.
[Jake accidentally drops on Finn.]
Finn: Ow!
Jake: Oof!
Finn: Ooh-la-la.
Jake: Whuzzat?
Finn: Mystery cave! C'mon, Jake! [Grunts while crawling through tiny entrance.] Oh, my glory...
[A tiny Jake comes through the entrance then gets back to normal size. The lamb relic is seen on a pedestal at the top of pyramid-arranged stairs. Finn walks up to it and nearly touches it.]
Jake: Dude, no!! Don't touch that thing! It's probably got some kind of sacred significance.
Finn: Yeah. I want it for my sacred bathroom.
[Finn touches it and the lamb lights up.]
Jake: Finn?! [The light dims down and Finn's face can be seen on the lamb; Finn has disappeared. Jake runs up to the lamb panting.] Oh, my Jah! Finn's become one with the lamb!!
[The scene is then viewed in the Spirit World version and Finn can be seen, along with numerous odd-looking Spirits.]
Finn: Jake!! You see this crazy jazz?!
[Normal view]
Jake: We'll get through this, my bro. I swear, I'm gonna get you out of that lamb.
[Jake goes down the pyramid steps and sits down. He tugs his tail twice and starts pulling himself out by retracting his tail.
[Spirit World view]
Finn: Jake! C'mon quit messin' with me. [Jake doesn't notice anything. The top of Jake's head goes through Finn's crotch as he pulls himself out.] WHOA!
Jake: [Going over rocks as he pulls himself out] Ow. Ow. [Hits the entrance] Ow. [He exits.]
[Scene transitions to the Tree Fort in the normal world view. Jake sighs then BMO sighs.]
Jake: Wish I knew how to free you, bro.
[Spirit World view]
Finn: Me, too, bro.
[Normal view. BMO begins making fart noises and Jake scowls.]
Jake: BMO, stop fake-farting.
BMO: But Finn always loved BMO farting. [Resumes making fart noises]
[Spirit World view]
Finn: Heh heh heh heh heh!
Jake: Hmm... [Normal view] That's it! We'll do all Finn's favorite stuff 'til he comes out! BMO! Play Finn's favorite song!
BMO: Okay!
[BMO activates his music player and starts singing "Three Baby Spiders" with Jake. Cut to Spirit World view]
Finn: What? Nooo... [The Spirits begin laughing at Finn.] No! Not this song!!
[Normal view. Jake and BMO are still singing.]
Jake: Are you hearing this, buddy?
[Spirit World view; Spirits are still laughing.]
Finn: Guys... I haven't liked this song since I was two. [Exasperated noise; Finn goes up to BMO and waves his hands in front of him.] Cut it OUT! [Finn tries to hit BMO but his blows go right through it. Finn walks out in frustration and sits on a branch outside. He notices a leaf go by.]
Ice King: Leaf Princess! [Normal view] Come to me, my arboreal beauty! Gotcha!
[Spirit World view]
Finn: [Scoffs] It's just a dumb old leaf, ya dumb old Ice King.
[Normal view]
Ice King: [To Finn] I know, but it's mine.
[Spirit World view]
Finn: Wait! What?! Ice King! You can hear me?
Ice King: Yes... Why? Are you makin' fun of me or something?
Finn: No, it's just no one else can see me or hear me talk.
Ice King: Ohhhh, yeah.... You're trapped in the Spirit Realm. I can see all things Spirit with my... Wizard Eyes!
Finn: Man... Never thought I'd be happy to talk to you, Ice King. Can ya help me get free??
[Normal view]
Ice King: Oh, yeah, I know all the ins and outs. And I'd do anything for a friend like you.
[Scene cuts to the Ice Kingdom at Ice King's lair.]
Penguin: Wenk.
Ice King: Quiet, Gunter. Can'tya see I'm hanging with Finn?
Penguin: Wenk wenk.
Ice King: I know I say that a lot, but this time it's true!
[The penguin walks away. The Spirit Realm is viewed.]
Finn: Anyways... Where do all these spirits come from?
Ice King: Oh, there are portals all over the universe. I have one in my basement! Every once in a while, a real cutie pie drifts through. Ooh! [Whispering] Oh, gosh, there she is. [To himself] Mm, oh, yeah... [Chuckles perversely]
Finn: Sick.
Ice King: What? I swear I never touch 'em! I can't! [Wafting through Spirits] Can't touch this, can't touch this... [Puts his hand through Finn.] Can't touch this, either. [Laughs] Yep, I can't kill any of them. [Looks down at a Spirit which secretes a liquid then flies away.] [Grave voice] I hate them... Okay, alright! 'Nuff messin' around. Let's getcha free from the Spirit Plane.
Finn: Cool.
[Cut to Ice King's basement.]
Ice King: Sooo, the only way to get out of the Spirit World is to stick all these lousy things in the Spirit Hole down there. Then plug up the hole with that.
Finn: And doing that will set me back to normal??
Ice King: Mm-hmmmm, trust me! We are tur-bros! Turbo bros! Tur-bros. Turbo. ...Bros.
[Beat. Finn scowls.]
Finn: [Suddenly smiling] So be it!
[Finn scatters around and forces the Spirits in the Spirit Hole. Scene goes back to the Tree Fort in the normal view.]
Jake: Alright, Finn. This oughta free you from your body prison. Couple-a' rounds of Kompy's Kastle will jog your psychic schnaps. That's what I think. Co-op mode like we always do! Oh, yeah! C'mon, Finn, drop the drawbridge. Kompy's blood lust meter's goin' down. Lemme help ya there. [Pushes the second controller's button; the drawbridge on the screen goes down.] Whuzza!! You love Kompy! [Beat. Jake sighs in sadness.]
[Cut back to the Ice Kingdom in the Spirit World view. Finn puts another Spirit in the hole.]
Finn: I... did it. [Drops down, exhausted] I did it. I'm ready, Ice King. Make me normal now.
Ice King: Ohhh, that's not all of 'em. There's this other guy that watches me. He's... super creepy. [Cut to Ice King's bathroom; Finn walks up to the toilet.] Do ya see it?? Oh, it see's you... [Panicking] Catch it and put it in the Spirit Hole! In the Spirit Hole where it can't see me anymore so you can be free!! [The eyeball creature goes in the toilet, and Finn says, "Huh?"; Finn pursues it still.] Get it! Get it!! [Finn grabs it.] GET IT IN THE HOLE!!
Finn: [Running back to the hole] Ew! Ew! Ew! [Throwing it in] Eeeewwww!! [He plugs the hole.]
Ice King: Yes! It's gone!
Finn: So... now I can go back to normal.
Ice King: Uhhh, wait, though.
Finn: ...What?
Ice King: There's this last guy you gotta get. He's pretty much the worst. He usually leaves these gross heads around, but I'm not seeing them anywhe— OH! [Panicking] THERE IT IS! THERE IT IS!!
Head: Wanwan. Wanwan. Wanwan.
Ice King: [Crying] Nooo...
Head: Wanwan! Wanwan!
Head: Wanwan!
Finn: What is that?
Ice King: It's from the dead one. He leaves these heads around everywhere. I can't even touch them, but it still creeps me out...
Head: Wanwan!
Ice King: Please get rid of him!
Finn: What do I do? Follow the heads?
Ice King: [Panicking] USE THE HEADS!! Oh, snow, please!
Finn: [Sighs] Alright, man, I'll get it. [Runs up to another head] Where's your daddy, huh? Is he hiding in there?
Head: Wanwan.
[The dead one is seen. It drops another head and Finn gets disgusted.]
Finn: You better get back in the Spirit Hole, dead one. [It secretes another head. Finn looks really grossed out.] Okay... [It shoots a head at Finn who cuts it with his Demon Sword; the head splits in two and covers Finn. The dead one runs over Finn and darts off while Finn pulls the goop off.]
The Dead One: [Running away] Wamwanwan.
[Finn chases after him but accidentally makes himself fall. ("Oh, bolts.") However, a flying spirit saves him ("WHOO! Yeah! Get 'im!") and Finn uses it to catch up to the dead one. Finn runs into it ("BOOSH!!") and knocks it in the hole. Finn hangs off the hole's ledge and looks inside.]
Finn: Oh, my what? The cave?? How the...??? ...Weird. That's weird, but whatevs, though. [Forces himself out of the hole, then plugs it.] Whatevs. Ice King! Ice Kiiiing! [To himself] Where'd you go, Simon? [Finn hears laughing.] Ice King? [He goes up to the Ice King's bedroom and looks into the door. Ice King laughs and sings a song of triumph, and he reveals that he tricked Finn.] Dude, come on, what?
Ice King: Ha ha, Finn! You fell right into for my brilliant plan [sic] that I formed out of the thin air like a true Magi! Not only did I get you to remove those horrible creatures from my castle, but now you're trapped, and only I can see you. So if you want friends, this is it, pal! [Laughs]
Finn: [Nonchalantly, walking away] I'm gonna re-open the hole.
Ice King: NO, WAIT, MY PLAN FELL APART!! [Finn comes back.] My... new plan is that you don't open the hole, and I destroy the porcelain lamb which will bring you back to the material plane. Heh heh... heh.
[Cut back to the Tree Fort in normal view. Jake is still playing video games. Ice King busts in.]
Ice King: Jake. [Drops down.] AGH, BLUH! GIMME THAT LAMB!
Jake: NO!! [Evades Ice King's attack] Finn's trapped in here!!
Ice King: That's why I have to smash it!!
Jake: You donk! I will smash you!! WAAAH!! [Smashes Ice King's armor]
Ice King: Escaped! [Jake yanks Ice King's cloak off] AAAH! My winter body!! I was gonna start up on the elliptical again, but I got depressed, okay?! Don't look at me!! [Runs off crying and accidentally trips onto the lamb; it lights up for a moment and Ice King disappears.]
Jake: [In shock] Whoooo?!
[Ice King's face appears on the lamb. Switch to Spirit Realm view]
Ice King: AAH! They're touching me for real! EWW!!
Finn: Great. Now we're both stuck in here.
Ice King: [Panicking] FINN, GIVE ME YOUR CLOTHES! [Jumps on Finn, and pulls on Finn's hat]
Ice King: I need a buffer!! AAAH! [Is thrown off by Finn, who is hatless.]
Finn: Ah, jeez, come on!
Ice King: [Puts on Finn's hat like a bra and lays down; he starts waving his hand] I'm sorry... I'm sorry, they were just touching me on the body... I'm sorry... [As he's talking, the patterns on the TV screen move back and forth.]
Finn: Whoa, do that again. [Ice King more or less repeats what he just did, and the patterns to the same thing.] Your hand is affecting the TV! We must have some kinda subtle effect on the material plane!
Ice King: Cooool. Whaddaya think, Finn? Can we pull back the veil of static and reach into the source of all being? Behind this curtain of patterns... this random pattern generator... So clever... right here in every home, watching us from a one-sided mirror... [Finn stares blankly.] Heh heh heh, whoops! Just wizard-talkin' to myself!
Finn: It's okay! But let's use our subtle influence to break the lamb!
Ice King: Yeah, a'ight. You mean like this?
Finn: Yeah, man! Bwoooo! [They both create winds and produce noticeable effects on the material plane] It's workin', man! Combine the swirls!
Ice King: Okay! Wha-zah!!
[Normal view]
Jake: Whoa! Finn, is that you?!
[The lamb starts to move]
Finn: [In Spirit World] YES!!
[Normal view]
Jake: Finn! Finn! Finn! [The lamb falls and breaks. Ice King and Finn reappear.] Whooooaaaa... [Embraces Finn] That was beautiful!
Finn: Heh-heh.
[Jake sweeps up the shattered lamb.]
Jake: Let's go flush this in the sacred bathroom!
[Finn and Jake both laugh, then Ice King joins them; Finn and Jake stop laughing and look uncomfortable. The episode ends with only Ice King laughing.]
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