Bad Little Boy/Transcript

[Scene shows Doctor Prince running away, holding the Enchiridion while being chased by Fionna and Cake who are riding a giant Gunter.]

Doctor Prince: Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!

[He jumps over some mushrooms.]

Fionna: Fire the laser cannon!

[The penguin fires laser beam out of its beak which hits Doctor Prince.]

Doctor Prince: Ah!

Cake: Good job, girl! Have some spaghetti!

[Cake shoves a ball of spaghetti into Fionna's mouth]

Fionna: Thanks!

Doctor Prince: Ha! Too bad I'm a really strong guy and I took my doctor pills this morning! Lasers don't hurt me!

[Doctor Prince throws a stranded dolphin at Fionna and Cake, but it misses.]

Dolphin: Next time...

Fionna and Cake: Give us the Enchiridion!

Doctor Prince: Ooh ooh ooh! [Imitates monkey sounds, and throws them the book]

Fionna: [Pleasantly surprised] Thanks... 

Cake: That's not a book! It's a bomb!

[Fionna throws the bomb into the air, and it explodes into confetti. Then the real Enchiridion opens and Ice King pops out of its pages, slapping Doctor Prince.]

Ice King: You've been acting like a real knucklehead Doctor Prince... go on, get out of here! And don't ever do wrong things again!

Doctor Prince: ...You're right. I see your side of things.

[Doctor Prince flips a switch on his belt, and flies away.]

Fionna: You saved the day mega-rad cool guy! What's your name?

Ice King: Oh, Ice King. I'm such a great guy! This book is yours...

Fionna: The Enchiridion! I want to be your best and closest friend.

Ice King: Let's have a best and closest friend lunch! It's mac'n'cheezles!

Fionna: Awww... what a good guy!

Cake: Aww, what a sweetie!

[Fionna and cake hug Ice King.]

Ice King: [crying tears of joy] I'm just so glad you guys are real... you're really really real! I'll remember this day forever!

[Ice King shoves some Mac and cheese in his pocket]

Fionna: Don't be sad, Ice King! We're going on a space adventure!

Cake: Hop on, baby!

[Ice King hops on Cake as she releases a laser beam on the ground, similar to a rocket]

Ice King: Weehee hee!

Fionna: Here we gooo!!!!

Slime Princess: Ice King, stop, please... This story is terrible!

[Scene cuts to the Ice Kingdom]

[Slime Princess, Turtle Princess, Wildberry Princess and Toast Princess all mumble in agreement.]

Wildberry Princess: Maybe this book is a new form of torture!

Ice King: Oh, come on! It's a first draft... don't hate! And besides, that story had everything. Action, adventure, a hotter, older guy... Wildberry don't pretend, I know you like the silver foxes. 

[Wildberry Princess looks stressed and disgusted as Ice King's eyebrows go up and down.]

Slime Princess: What if it were a... little more like real life?

Ice King: Real? It's based on the real Fionna and Cake!

Slime Princess: Yeah... but what if there was a little more romance in the story?

[Princesses mumble in agreement.]

Ice King: You all are just hatin' on my steeze! I'm not listening to haters. Haters!

[Suddenly, Ice King's gown goes up over his face, and the Princesses' cages are opened.]

Ice King: What the...? Whoa oh... I'm sorry I didn't think you were real, Gob... but now I've seen your power, and I've got some things that I did that I have to say sorry for.

[Marceline makes herself visible.]

Marceline: Boo.

Ice King: [shocked] Marceline, how long have you been in here?

Marceline: Mmm... couple hours. [sits on the Ice King's throne]

Ice King: Oh, so you heard my story, then... Awesome, right?

Marceline: It's... good... but, maybe it's time to let someone else try. [She points to herself as Ice King seems unhappy and frustrated.] Listen up, y'all! I've got a story of my own!

[Scene shifts to the internal story; Fionna is swinging her weapons in the tree fort, and one of them nails an apple just above BMO's head.]

Fionna: Hyah! Hyah!

Cake: Ooh, nice throw!

Fionna: Thanks! I've got to do something today.

Cake: What about Gumball's mission we went on this morning? Delivering daisy chains to the fluffy people not enough for you?

Fionna: Uh... sometimes Gumball's missions can be so... lame.

[Fionna throws another weapon, which cuts right through Prince Gumball's hair.]

Prince Gumball: Hello, every—

[Fionna and Cake gasp.]

Prince Gumball: Oh my! Looks like you almost skronked up my dome piece! [He licks he finger then puts it on his 'dome piece' to fix it.] Boy, have I got a treat for you two! The fluffy people and I baked these in appreciation for the mission you completed. They're cream puffs... try one.

Fionna: Uh... I'd love to, but... maybe later...

[They hear a thumping sound outside.]

Fionna: What was that?

[While they are distracted, something flashes by and grabs all of Prince Gumball's cream puffs.]

Prince Gumball: Aww...

Fionna: Something's on the roof! Come on!

Cake: I'm not going out there! It's wet.

Prince Gumball: It is wet...

Fionna: [frustrated] Mhnn...

[Fionna carries Gumball up to the roof, where Marshall Lee is playing his bass.]

Prince Gumball: Oh... it's just him.

Marshall Lee: Oh, hey Fionna.

Fionna: Marshall Lee!

Prince Gumball: Ahem!

Marshall Lee: [sarcastically] Oh, forgive me! Hello, your majesty!

[Marshall Lee bows for Prince Gumball. He sucks the red out of one of the cream puffs.]

Prince Gumball: Fionna, take me back inside.

Marshall Lee: What? Is he kidding?

[Marshall throws cream puff at Gumball.]

Prince Gumball: Oh honestly! I'm going in. Come and join me when you want more polite company. [He gets the umbrella and goes back down.]

Fionna: Be careful!

Prince Gumball: Whoa!

Fionna: You got it!

Marshall Lee: What a wad.

Fionna: [Blushing] A... a gumwad?

Cake: Fionna!

Marshall Lee: [chuckles] Let's ditch him!

Fionna: Uh...

Marshall Lee: [Turning into a giant bat] Lumpy Space Prince is throwing a party in the woods! It's gonna be freaky nasty!

Fionna: Umm...

Marshall Lee: I know you're gonna say yes to me, so... Let's just go.

[Fionna rides Marshall in his bat form to Lumpy Space Prince's party. Lumpy Space Prince and Female Cinnamon Bun are dancing together.]

Lumpy Space Prince: Oh, yeah! Mmmm!

Marshall Lee: This looks fun... bunch. Come on.

Lumpy Space Prince: You guys! Marshall Lee's gonna play a song, you guys!

[Everyone cheers as Fionna and Marshall Lee take the stage. The song Good Little Girl begins.]

Marshall Lee: Follow my lead.

[Marshall starts dancing, and Fionna mimics him. Marshall begins to shake his bum.]

Fionna: Hey! [playfully pushes Marshall]

Marhsall Lee: Good little girl. Always picking a fight with me, you know that I'm bad... But you're spending the night with me... What do you want from my world? You're a good little girl.

Fionna: Bad little boy.

[Crowd cheers.]

Fionna: That's what you're acting like, I really don't buy! That you're that kind of guy... and if you are, why do you want to hang out with me?

Marshall Lee: [Talk-singing] Don't you know that I'm a villain? Every night I'm out killing sending everyone runnin' like children. I know why you're mad at me. I've got demon eyes, and they're looking right through your anatomy... into your deepest fears. Baby, I'm not from here. I'm from the Nightosphere... To me, you're clear. Transparent. You got a thing for me, girl. It's apparent.

Cake: Oh, oh! [Singing] I got a hot potata! And I gots two hot tomatas! Well they'll make a good sauce maybe...

Fionna: You're not so bad, you know.

Marshall Lee: Not so bad? I'm the son of a demon... and the Vampire King. It's not something I have to try at. You on the other hand...

Cake: [Still singing] ... on the table... the table... for as long as I am able!

Fionna: I'm not trying to be bad... I'm hanging out with you because you're my friend.

Marshall Lee: What? Like him?

Fionna: No... different!

[Marshall playfully trips Fionna.]

Fionna: Hey! Yah!

[Fionna kicks his feet in an attempt to trip him.]

Marshall Lee: [Sarcastically] Oh no... [Laughs as he floats in the air]

[Fionna elbows him in the stomach to force him to the ground; he kicks her away.]

Cake: Hey, break it up, you too!!

[Marshall pushes Cake to the side.]

Marshall Lee: Out of my way, kitty.

Fionna: Hey!

Marshall Lee: Oh, come on! That was funny!

Fionna: Cake! You okay?

Cake: Yeah...

Fionna: Come on, let's get outta here.

Marshall Lee: Hey! Come on... where you goin'? What's the deal? You're missing the party! Fionna, lighten up!

Fionna: Look, I don't care if you're being a jerk to me... but nobody messes with Cake.

Marshall Lee: Oh, really? Well, what if I just take her right now?

Fionna: What?

[Marshall Lee steals Cake.]

Marshall Lee: Unexpected!

Fionna: MARSHALL!

[Marshall laughs evilly.]

Fionna: Cake!

Marshall Lee: You want your Cake back? Come and get her!

[Marshall summons the undead to attack Fionna, and one of them starts a beat.]

Marshall Lee: [Rapping] Did you think I was lying? I said I'm evil, without even trying! [Fionna starts fighting the skeletons.] Already dead, so I'm not scared of dying... Drinking the red from your heart in one sitting. You think you've got me pegged, you must be kidding. I raise the dead up, and they do my bidding. Girl, I'm a thousand years old, I'm a riddle... Bad little boy! Yes, I'm bad, but not little.

Cake: Uh-uh boy, what are you thinking?

[Cake grows then Marshall counters it with his bat form.]

Cake: Fionna!

Fionna: Cake!

Cake: Grab onto my little paws!

[Fionna pulls Cake from Marshall Lee's grasp, causing him to impale himself on a stake.]

Fionna: Marshall?

Marshall Lee: Oh, this is bad, guys... This is really bad!

Fionna: Marshall!

[Sunlight begins to burn Marshall's face.]

Fionna: Come on! You gotta be okay!

Marshall Lee: This is it for me, Fionna... so... why don't you just admit it...? You're in love with me...

Fionna: I get that you flirt with me all the time, and you think it's funny or whatever, but you're doing that now?! [Fionna's voice begins to break and starts to tear up.] What are you trying to do to my head? You think I've got some little crush on you? Well, for however long we've got left... FOR ONCE, DROP IT, YOU FREAK!

[Marshall Lee pulls out the stake, revealing his shirt was stuffed with cream puffs.]

Marshall Lee: Faking it! Faking it! Okay, my shirt is, like, filled with cream puffs!

Cake: Oh, goodness!

Marshall Lee: Glob, Fionna... you're like the realest person I've ever met... [Fionna punches Marshall in the face] Ow, my cheek meat!

[Fionna begins to cry and laugh hysterically.]

Marshall Lee: Quit clowning, Fionna. F-Fionna? Fionna! 

[He gets punched again. The story ends.]

Marceline: The end.

[Princesses mumble in satisfaction.]

Ice King: Oh, come on! You guys got mad at me for a bad story? I mean it's cute, but... that's not how'd they be! But look, it might not be too late to polish this piece off—let's stipball off some ideas. Like, if Marshall Lee gets sick and dies, but he's got a brother we didn't know about! His name's Marshall Lee...roy. Boom, shocker! [Rubs Marceline's leg] Oh! I feel goosebumps!

Slime Princess: I like how it is!

[All the other princesses agree.]

Ice King: [Quietly angry] Everyone get out... [Marceline and the Princesses leave the Ice king's castle. Ice King sighs and then goes to his secret Fionna and Cake shrine.] I know you're out there somewhere... I just haven't figured out how to get to you... but believe me, I will! I will...