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Adventure Time Wiki

This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Adventure Time" from season 0, which aired on January 11, 2007.

Ice Kingdom
This transcript is complete.


[The episode starts with Pen sleeping under a tree and a meditating Jake floating. Pen wakes up and rushes to Jake.]
Pen: Jake! Jake! Good mornin'! Whatcha doin', buddy?
Jake: Meditating.
Pen: What are you meditating about, dude?
Jake: Wait, dude. I'm connecting to the internet with my mind.
[Dial-up connection sound]
Pen: Ha ha! Beep boop boop boop beep boop.
[Jake descends to the ground.]
Jake: Check it out—I downloaded a little dance. [Begins to dance]
Pen: Huh, I like it. Yeeoow! [Starts to dance, too]
[Continue dancing until Lady Rainicorn comes flying by]
Pen: Whoa! Algebraic!
Jake: Look! It's Princess Bubblegum's rainicorn! She looked like she was crying.
Pen: Well, let's go cheer her up. To the max!
Jake: Yeah! Yeah, let's do it!
[They begin to run.]
Pen: Woo hoo!
Jake: [Grows huge] Rrrrroar!
[Chase after Lady Rainicorn]
Lady Rainicorn: [Crying]
Pen: Hey! What's wrong!?
Lady Rainicorn: [Still crying]
Pen: Wanna hear a funny joke!?
Lady Rainicorn: [Cries even louder]
Pen: Knock-knock!
Lady Rainicorn: [Cries frantically]
Pen: Who's there?
Lady Rainicorn: [Cries even more]
Pen: Woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo, who?
Lady Rainicorn: [Cries and flies away]
Pen: Man, that wasn't very funny.
Jake: She's flying into the Ice Kingdom.
Pen: Aw, the Ice King is an oxymoron.
Jake: Seriously... but what are we gonna do?
Pen: Survey the situation.
[Pulls out binoculars and looks at Ice King's castle. Ice King is shooting ice lightning at Lady Rainicorn. Pen sighs.]
Jake: What's up?
Pen: The Ice King is throwing frozen lightning bolts at the Rainicorn.
Jake: [Puts on the binoculars] That guy is a total patoot.
Pen: He's like 50 patoots!
[Ice King continues to shoot frozen lightning at Lady Rainicorn; Princess Bubblegum is behind him.]
Jake: Whoa! And there's Princess Bubblegum!
Pen: [sigh] The Ice King is always stealing princesses. We're going in turbo time! [puts on a sweater] You want your booties?
Jake: Yes, please. [Jumps in the air] Howop! [Booties are thrown up into Jake's feet and he comes down] Let's do it!
Pen: What time is it?
Pen & Jake: Adventure time!
[Jump into the Ice Kingdom]
Pen: Penguins!
[Fall into a horde of penguins and use them to skate down a mountain]
Pen: Mathematical!
Jake: That was totally math!
Pen: Rhombus! Iceclops!
Iceclops: Did somebody say my name?
[Pen and Jake scream and jump in a ditch.]
Pen: That was close!
Jake: Oh, my goodness!
[Pen grabs snow, turns it into snowballs and has Jake carry it.]
Pen: Let's rock and roll!
Iceclops: [Roars]
Pen: Ice to meet you! [Throws snowballs at it]
Iceclops: Hey, cut it out!
Pen: Snow Golem!
Snow Golem: [Baby sounds]
[Pen throws snowballs in its eyes and it cries.]
Pen: Elemental!
Fire Elemental: I'm lost. Can you direct me towards the sun?
Pen: That way.
Fire Elemental: What? Oh, geez, duh! Thanks.
Pen: Snow problem! [Throw snowballs at him]
Fire Elemental: [moans] Oh, real nice! How old are you?
Pen: I'm 12 years old!
Jake: I'm 28!
[Ice King cackles.]
Pen: Hey, Ice King! Stop it!
[Jake extends his legs, taking him and Pen to the Ice King's window.]
Ice King: Heh? Stop meddling, boy! You and your magical dog can't harm me.
Pen: He's not my dog! He's my friend! [Jumpkicks Ice King in the face]
[They fall into the Ice King's castle and begin to fight; Jake begins to talk to Lady Rainicorn.]
Jake: Hey, how's it goin'? My name's Jake.
Lady Rainicorn: [Coos like a pigeon]
Pen: Why are you always stealing ladies?
Ice King: I'm going to make one marry me! [Cackles]
Pen: That's... stupid!
Ice King: Your hat is stupid!
Pen: My hat is awesome! [Jumpkicks him again] Where's Jake?
Jake: [To Lady Rainicorn] Are you kidding? I play the viola too.
Lady Rainicorn: [Coos]
Jake: You are crazy. You are so crazy.
Ice King: [With ice lightning in his hands] Now I've got you, boy! [Freezes Pen]
[Scene shifts to Mars.]
Pen: What's going on? Ab...Abraham Lincoln?
Lincoln: Pen, your mind has been transported back in time... and to Mars.
Pen: What?
Lincoln: It doesn't matter, but what does matter is you need to believe in yourself.
[Scene switches back to the Ice Kingdom.]
Pen: [Breaking out of the ice] Never!
[Ice King is laughing and carries Princess Bubblegum to the window.]
Princess Bubblegum: Pen!
[Ice King flies out the window.]
Pen: Princess!
Jake: Let's go!
[Pen, Jake and Lady Rainicorn go after Ice King and Princess Bubblegum; when they catch up, Pen jumps at them in slow motion and grabs Princess Bubblegum]
Ice King: Heh?
[They fall and Lady Rainicorn catches them.]
Pen & Princess Bubblegum: Yay!
Ice King: Nwah. How dare they trifle with me. They can't possibly think they can win!
Jake: Hey, sloppy milkshake!
Ice King: Wha?
Jake: Why don't you pick on someone your own size?
Ice King: Fool! Your powers are no match for my magical crown!
[Jake punches off the crown.]
Ice King: [falling] My powers! Foul and noisome whelp! You've not seen the last of my wintery fangs! I'll cleave the warmth from your bones and stop still your beating heart with my claaaaws...
[Back on the ground]
Pen: There you go, Princess. You are free.
Princess Bubblegum: Oh, thank you, brave knight.
Pen: Oh, I'm not a knight. I'm a boy.
Princess Bubblegum: Well, then, thank you, brave boy. [Kisses Pen on the forehead and he blushes]
Pen: Ha ha ha ha ha!
Jake: Whoa, what is going on?
Pen: Uh, nothing.
Princess Bubblegum: [Giggles]
Pen: [Pushes Jake along] We got to go, okay, bye, Princess. Bye.
Jake: Go where, dude? We don't have anything to do.
Pen: Heh, heh, yeah we do, buddy. Adventure awaits.
Jake: I don't see any adventures going on anywhere. I think we're good to just sit here for a while and just talk about our feelings.
Pen: Heh, uh, look! Those ninjas are stealing that Old Man's diamonds!
[Ninjas are running off with an old man's diamonds.]
Old man: Give me back my diamonds!
Pen: Later, Princess! I have to attend to this!
Princess Bubblegum: Fair thee well, Pen and Jake.
Pen: Jake!
Jake: What time is it?
Pen & Jake: Adventure time!
[They run after the ninjas.]

Episode ends