Card Wars (episode)

Synopsis
Finn and Jake play an epic card game, where Jake becomes overly competitive.

Plot
The episode starts at the Tree Fort with Finn eating sandwiches and drinking juice on the couch. Jake soon walks in with a box and sighs obnoxiously to get Finn's attention. Finn asks what's in the box, and Jake eventually explains that the box contains the cards to play "Card Wars." Jake explains that Lady Rainicorn doesn't want to play with him anymore because he always beats her, and Finn tells Jake that he wants to play. They begin setting up a table with snacks as BMO walks by. Jake asks if BMO wants to play with them, but he ominously replies that he does "not play such games...with Jake".

Shrugging off BMO's cryptic words, Finn and Jake decide the stakes: the winner will be a "cool guy", and the loser will be a "dweeb". Jake fills two cups with soda, but adds coffee grounds, beetle butter, grape jelly, Kimchi, and Ham Chunk Juice to one. Finn laments the loss of perfectly good soda, but Jake quickly writes labels on the cups and explains that this is part of the stakes; the winner will get the normal "cool guy" cup, and the loser must drink from the gross "dweeb" cup. After Finn agrees, Jake explains the rules of Card Wars, which takes two hours. Jake then sets up his kingdom and prepares to start the game, noticing Finn has fallen asleep from the long-winded explanation of the rules. Finn says to start anyway despite Jake's protests, and the two begin playing.

Both players "floop" their land cards, Jake reminding Finn to keep his hand hidden to avoid giving his opponent a tactical advantage. He then begins his turn by activating "The Silo of Truth", which shows him all of the cards in Finn's hand. Jake mocks Finn's hand, but takes one of Finn's cards, "Cerebral Blood Storm", which magically flies into his hand. Entering his battle phase, Jake proceeds to summon his "Husker Knights" for an attack on Finn's "Schoolhouse", backed by his stolen "Cerebral Blood Storm". When prompted to defend, Finn asks if his "Cool Dog" and "Ancient Scholar" can defend against the knights, which Jake laughs off as obviously impossible.

Finn then floops "The Pig", which Jake says is illegal - creatures must be "activated" to attack or defend. However, Finn is flooping the pig not to attack, but to activate its effect. To Jake's horror, Finn's pig marches into Jake's kingdom and begins to eat his corn fields. Since the "Husker Knights" are powered by corn fields, the pig inadvertantly causes them to fall apart, negating Jake's attack. Furthermore, Jake's "Cerebral Blood Storm" only destroys his own troops, since Finn isn't attacking. Jake is upset at Finn's progress, but Finn explains that it is "just logic"; pigs eat corn. Unable to argue with the results, Jake grimly announces the end of his turn.

Finn then starts his own turn, only for Jake to point out that he needs to discard a card from his hand before drawing a new one. As Finn does so, Jake mocks him as "a baby in the woods", warning that Finn's "beginner's luck ends now". However, Finn surprises his friend by adding two new buildings to his kingdom: "Spirit Tower" and "The Cave of Solitude". In his own battle phase, Finn sends his pig to "The Cave of Solitude" for a nap and sends his "Ancient Scholar" to study in the "Schoolhouse". A bewildered Jake asks if Finn was planning to attack, but Finn explains that he will attack on another turn.

At that, Jake gleefully declares that fate has turned in his favor, declaring his intent to destroy Finn's pig and regain the advantage on his turn. He plays "Field of Nightmares" to summon a legion of "Earlings"; which, Finn points out, are unable to enter "The Cave of Solitude". Switching tactics, Jake attempts to cast "Teleport" to bring the pig out,  but Finn notes that "Teleport" only works on the caster's creatures. Jake admits that Finn is correct, but vows to slay "The Pig", only for Finn to smugly remind him that none of Jake's creatures can reach his pig. Confident in his position, Finn taunts an increasingly flustered Jake, declaring that he is the "cool guy".

The taunt, however, gives Jake an idea; he excitedly floops his "Volcano" despite Finn's shocked protests. Although the resulting lava flow annihilates most of Jake's own kingdom, a stray rock destroys Finn's cave, along with the pig inside it. Happy that he finally killed the pig, Jake plays "Reclaim Landscape" to restore his kingdom to its original state, reviving his "Husker Knights" in the process. Next, Jake moves his "Useless Swamp" card to reveal "The Immortal Mazewalker", a powerful-looking spirit creature that does triple damage if its controller has cornfields in their kingdom.

With a triumphant scream of "I told you cornfields were awesome!", Jake prepares to attack, only for Finn's "Ancient Scholar" to emerge from the undamaged "Schoolhouse". Finn explains that his scholar had been studying a "raise the dead" ability, which he uses to resurrect his pig. Jake looks on in horror and rage as Finn floops his pig once more, devastating Jake's knights by destroying his cornfields. Finn then notices that his "Spirit Tower" is "doing a thing" as it brings Jake's "Immortal Mazewalker" over to Finn's side. Aghast at the "ganking" of his Mazewalker, Jake walks away from the table, grumbling to himself in frustration. A worried Finn suggests a break, only for Jake to grow to a huge size and dangle Finn off his finger, ordering him to play the game. After recalling BMO's statement that he did not play Card Wars with Jake, Finn says he needs to go to the bathroom (or the "boy's style room") so he can get away from the table and find BMO.

After dropping on Finn's head with his "BMO Chop" attack, BMO explains that the last time he beat Jake in Card Wars, Jake didn't talk to him for a month. Finn realizes that his well-intentioned attempt to cheer Jake up is only making things worse, and BMO suggests that he will have to "take a dive". As Jake pulls Finn from all the way upstairs back to the table - again demanding that he play the game - Finn decides to intentionally lose. He declares that he is about to use his ultimate move, but instead of sending "The Immortal Mazewalker" to finish the game, he chooses to send his pig into battle. The Pig moves into a muddy section of Jake's kingdom to attack his last creature, a "Wandering Bald Man", and a pathetic but suspenseful battle ensues.

To both Finn and Jake's dismay, the pig wins the battle, and a scowling Jake prepares to admit defeat. However, as the pig begins to return to Finn's side, it gets stuck in the mud and falls under Jake's control. This causes Jake to regain his excitement; since pigs can't leave mud landscapes once they enter, he gleefully declares "the pig is mine!" He then plays another "Reclaim Landscape" card to restore his cornfields, before summoning "Archer Dan" to destroy all of Finn's buildings with corn-tipped arrows. For his final move, Jake summons a large, reaper-like creature that takes control of all of Finn's creatures. Jake triumphantly explains that he has won, since Finn has no creatures left.

Finn calmly congratulates Jake even as the dog rubs his face in the game board and hands over the "dweeb" cup. After taking a sip, Finn claims that it's good and asks if Jake wants to try it, and a surprised Jake obliges. He then immediately spits it out because it's disgusting, and Finn jokingly calls him a dweeb. The scene then closes with the two of them still sipping the gross drink, while BMO is shaking his head at them in disappointment.

Characters

 * Finn
 * Jake
 * BMO
 * Snail (cameo)
 * Lady Rainicorn (mentioned)
 * Notch

Trivia

 * A preview of this episode was shown on July 14 during Cartoon Network's Big Fan Weekend 2012.
 * Only thirteen cards in the game were used: "Silo of Truth", "Cerebral Blood Storm", "Husker Knights", "Ancient Scholar", "The Pig", "The Cave of Solitude", "Spirit Tower", "Field of Nightmares", "Volcano", "Reclaim Landscape", "The Immortal Maizewalker", "Summon Archer Dan", and the unnamed reaper-like creature Jake uses to take control of Finn's creatures. "Useless Swamp", "Cool Dog", "Teleport", and "Wandering Old Man" were all named, but never used directly.
 * This episode was rerated TV-PG-V.
 * Jake apparently calls his Card Wars kingdom "Jakoria". He also references "the Five Winds", which are presumably part of the game's lore.
 * This is the first time Jake has referred to Finn as Finn Human.
 * The same music played in the title card is also played when the pig is activated and eats Jake's corn fields.

Cultural references

 * The card game contains various game attributes from popular trading card games such as Yu-Gi-Oh, Pokémon, and Magic the Gathering.
 * Jake's kingdom includes structures similar to Stonehenge, the Greek Parthenon, and the Roman Colosseum.
 * Finn called himself "A Card Wars super Amadeus!" in reference to Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart's genius.

Episode connections

 * The flame explosion in the long preview before the "Card Wars" title was also used in the "Princess Cookie" preview.
 * The Cup of Many Ales from "Video Makers" is seen again in this episode.
 * Finn calls a room a "boy-style room," which he called the bathroom in "The Silent King," indicating that the room may be colored baby blue, Finn's favorite color.
 * The music that plays during the scene in which Jake explains the rules of the game to Finn was originally used in "Too Young," during the "Prank Machine" scene.

Errors

 * After Jake says "And then you'll hate me" what he wrote on both cups disappears.
 * The cups move in between some scenes.
 * The word 'DWEEB' is seen written on two different parts of a cup even though Jake only wrote it once.
 * There are continuity errors regarding Finn's missing teeth.
 * Some things that were on the table are gone when Jake takes Finn back to the game, though it could've been Jake that took them somewhere else.
 * When Finn's "Spirit Tower" captures Jake's "Immortal Mazewalker", Jake calls the latter a "Spirit Walker".
 * At about 10:57 into the episode, Finn's schoolhouse and tower﻿ are still on the board after they've been destroyed, but when it zooms out, they're both gone again.
 * When Finn is done eating his sandwich, he lies on the couch. When the camera zooms out, it is seen that their couch seems a lot bigger than Finn.
 * Apparently, a card is "flooped" by turning it to the left, and "activated" by turning it to the right. With this in mind, it's noticeable that Jake activated his land cards at the beginning of the game; also, Finn activated the Spirit Tower and Cave of Solitude, instead of flooping.
 * When Finn sends his pig to attack Jake's "Wandering Bald Man, the creatures are at the edge of the "Useless Swamp", After the pig defeats the bald man and get stuck in the swamp, it appears in the middle of the swamp.

Production notes

 * This episode was originally titled "Card Quest."
 * This episode was originally scheduled to air on July 2, 2012. However, due to a last minute programming change, it was moved to Monday, July 16, putting it after the two-part episode: "Princess Monster Wife," and "Goliad."

Storyline analysis

 * This episode reveals that Jake has a very obsessive-competitive personality that he can't control even when it comes to Finn, Lady Rainicorn, and/or BMO.
 * It is shown that Finn and BMO are better at Card Wars than Jake; BMO says that he beat Jake, and Finn let Jake win so he wouldn't ignore him for a month or longer like he did to BMO. It is also possible that Lady Rainicorn herself may be better at Card Wars than Jake too; she may let him win in order to avoid any trouble or she doesn't like being beat by him, much less the way he behaves when he plays the game.
 * Ironically, both Finn and Jake turn the tide of their game with seemingly useless cards. Finn uses "The Pig" to devastate the cornfields powering Jake's army; in turn, Jake's "Useless Swamp" allows him to gain control of "The Pig" after it battles his "Wandering Bald Man" in the swamp.