User blog:Pancake Pancake Pancake/Findings on the I Remember You newspaper article

In the episode, "I Remember You", as you know, Marceline finds a newspaper article about Simon Petrikov. I have decoded (most of) that article.

Here's the original picture:

And here's what it says ( is where it's illegible):

Simon Petrikov Unearths Ancient Treasure

Silly man returns from expidition with a marginally exciting discovery. By Bruce G

It wasorg that greethof hard-drhalistscurious pigeons. Torrotu press conference was convenprofessor of archaeologynd bon viva Simon Petrikov. You may remember Petrikov from t thing Fnva. Well that g from his to expedition in the dd or wherever.

With much pomp Petrikov unveiled the most significant ce from the dig to a rapt ddnce ou it was just a book. A rattfoung leatherbound manual whose title eriff had trarrad as "Tne Enchiridion".

The covewida still life d ins w va cy of gerris was alrip loo

"The book seems to contain rules of conduct

(CAPTION) Simon Petrikov delivers his latest find to the Museum of History