Five Short Graybles/Transcript

(The episode starts up in Cuber's spaceship. He's warming himself near a hearth.)

Cuber: (Turning to the viewer) Hmm? (Laughing) Oh, greeble bayble grapes. (?) You're just in time. Bayble Cuber's going to watch an inkle dribble (?) adventure from days of old on my holo-pyramid viewer. Five stories each relating to one special theme. See if you graybles can guess the theme by the end of the episode, okay? Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

(The clip starts up on the viewer. The Tree Fort is viewed.)

Finn: Okay, BMO, (we'll) be back in an hour. You sure you don't need anything from the Grocery Kingdom?

BMO: No, I don't need anything. Thank you. Okay, goodbye, Finn and Jake!

Finn: Bye, BMO!

Jake: Yeah, see ya later, BMO!

(They exit. BMO goes up a ladder (while grunting) to get to the upper story of the fort. It (BMO) is seen pulling a stool into the bathroom. It closes the door, and grunts while climbing onto the stool. It stands in front of a mirror.)

BMO: Finn? Jake? (Talking to reflection) Well, hello there. Oh, hello! Who are you? My name is Football. What's yours? I am BMO. (Beat) BMO, are you a robot? (Gasps) Oh, no, Football! I am a little living boy! Oh! That sounds wonderful, BMO! Will you teach me about being alive? Yes, Football! Watch me! (BMO pretends to brush its teeth and "Football" gasps. BMO smacks its face with soap and "Football" gasps again. BMO then grabs a glass of water and sits on the toilet to pour water in. "Football" gasps.) Pee-ing! Oh, BMO, that's fantastic! (Camera turns 90 degrees to the left to reveal that Finn and Jake are watching BMO through the window.) Oh, thank you, Football! It's really nothing. (BMO continues talking.)

Jake: What the...?

Finn: See, man? I told you.

Jake: This is nuts. Plus, he's usin' my toothbrush!

Finn: No, man. That's my toothbrush. (Beat; the two look at each other)

Finn and Jake: (In disgust) UGH!

(Jake retracts back towards the ground.)

Finn: (Reading to-do list) "Prove that BMO does weird junk when nobody is around." Check! (Checks item off list)

Jake: High-five, buddy!

(After their hands miss, they achieve a flimsy and unimpressive high-five.)

Finn: That was pretty weak.

Jake: Yeah. I was thinkin' the same thing.

Finn: You wanna give it another go?

Jake: Yeah.

(They high-five again, more effectively this time.)

Finn: That was better... but we can do better.

Jake: You mean even better.

Finn: Let's back on up and run at each other!

Jake: Okay!

(They run away a short distance from each other.)

Finn and Jake: (Voices crescendoing) Aaaaaahhhh.... (Their hands meet thunderously.) ZAH!!

Jake: Ooh, kinda stings!

Finn: I like the pain.

Jake: Let's do another one.

(Cut to Finn in a location far away from the Tree Fort)

Finn: Ready!?

(Cut to Jake on the border of the Ice Kingdom.)

Jake: Yeah!

(They run towards each other with their voices crescendoing; they shout and scream as they prepare their high five. As soon as they're near each other, they jump up and high-five.)

Finn: Jake!

Jake: Yeah?

Finn: I know how we can do the most ultimate high-five ever!!

Jake: You've gone crazy mad with power lust! And I'm lovin' it!!

(Cut to Finn in a mountainous area presumably miles and miles away from the Tree Fort. Finn is sitting in a catapult.)

Finn: (Talking on walky-talky) You ready to do this, dude!?

Jake: (On speaker) I've been ready this whole time, dude! Just waitin' you to say when you're--

Finn: SUPER-ULTIMATE HIGH-FIVE GO!!!

(In the Desert of Doom, Jake launches himself like a catapult. In a split screen, Finn and Jake are shown zooming at each other at tremendous speeds, about to perform their ultimate high-five. The scene suddenly cuts to Princess Bubblegum in her castle working on something in an irritated mood.)

Princess Bubblegum: Ugh...

Peppermint Butler: A glass of delicious, nourishing water for my lady--(Princess Bubblegum knocks the water away) AAH!! (Exits)

Princess Bubblegum: (Frustrated sigh; she stares at her paper and gasps.) Oh, yes!