Be Sweet/Transcript

[ crickets chirping ]

>> ugh.

Reduced to marking my camp with

bear sweat.

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Those bears did  not want to give

up that sweat, but it keeps the

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Rodents from nibbling my lumps

while I sleep.

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Ouch! I feel something crunchy!

Like fried chicken!

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Oh, it  is fried chicken!

[ leaves rustling ]

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>> [ roars ]

>> oh, my glob -- forest

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Creature!

I'd better eat it real fast!

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[ gasps ] get back here!

[ breathing heavily ]

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[ shouting indistinctly ]

aah!

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What my life has become!

[ cellphone ringing ]

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Hello?

Oh, my glob!

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[ doorbell ringing ]

>> oh, wonderful!

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Welcome in, lsp.

Uh, I want to go through --

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>> this place is so clean and

nice!

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>> you're so kind.

>> do you have a sink?!

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>> uh, there's one in the

kitchen, and --

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>> I'll use the one in the

kitchen!

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[ sighs ]

>> I need to tell you all the

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S--

>> get me a towel!

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Help me down!

>> o-okay, I-I really do need to

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Tell you how to care for

sweet p.

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Uh, there's a proper procedure

for sweet p's special tuck-in

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Time.

You have to be  real sweet to

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Him.

Pat him gently on the head, kiss

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His cheeks...

>> what?

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>> ...And give him treats.

Sing to him real, real soft and

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Sweet and touch your forehead to

his and think the words, "you

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Are more precious than anything

in this world, and I will

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Always, always love you."

then he'll fall asleep and have

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Sweet dreams.

>> oh, my glob, I'll do all

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That!

Okay, bye!

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Have a wonderful time!

[ pop! ]

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[ crickets chirping ]

>> time to get down to the

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Chill-out!

[ feet pounding ]

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What a princess like me

deserves.

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Aah! Don't hurt me!

>> I'm sweet p.

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>> I didn't know you were huge.

>> I'm hungry.

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>> okay, let's check what's in

the fridge.

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Do you like pizza?

>> I like pizza.

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>> [ grunts ]

get the pizza, sweet p!

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[ feet pounding ]

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Now I can kick back.

[ chuckles ]

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Refrigerators are just great!

I never stopped to think how

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Great they are.

[ sniffles ]

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[ munching loudly ]

[ muffled ] now I'm cold,

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Though.

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Oh, what?!

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I'm still cold.

[ blows ]

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Rich-person indoor fire is just

so great.

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[ sniffles ]

I'm feeling all toasty!

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Must be time for toast!

I'm waiting...

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Waiting...

Waiting...

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All done!

[ crunching ]

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It's not black and crunchy like

when I throw bread into my

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Campfire.

[ mid-tempo music playing ]

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This music's way better than

owls' hoots.

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[ mid-tempo music continues ]

I deserve this.

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>> [ roars ]

>> no! You're an animal!

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You can't come inside!

[ breathing heavily ]

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[ mid-tempo music continues ]

>> [ munches, gulps ]

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[ bed creaks ]

[ feet pounding ]

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I'm ready to be tucked in now.

Hello?

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Will you be sweet to me?

[ mid-tempo music playing ]

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[ feet pounding ]

sweetness must be out there in

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The night to guide my sleepy

boat right.

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[ feet pounding ]

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[ cellphone ringing ]

>> yo!

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>> hey, marcy!

>> lspita bread, what's up?

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>> just chillin' in my awesome

bubble bath!

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>> did you break into someone's

house again?

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>> [ sighs ]

I have a  new life now and a

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Career.

>> I didn't know you had any

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Skills.

>> success isn't about skills.

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It's about being cool.

These people just randomly

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Approached me, like, "hey, we

will totally pay you to hang

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Out in our sick mansion and feed

our baby or whatever."

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>> well, good for you, dude.

>> I mean, I feel like a totally

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New person now that I'm finally

getting what I deserve.

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[ rumbling ]

oh, my glob, what is that?!

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>> [ roaring ]

>> aah!

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>> lsp?

Mm.

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>> [ roars ]

>> [ breathes heavily ]

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Take this, you dandruff!

[ bonk! ]

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[ laughs ]

>> lsp.

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>> huh?

>> you don't belong here in the

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World of decent people.

You belong in the woods with...

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Garbage animals!

>> noooooooo!

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[ feet pounding ]

[ crickets chirping ]

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[ film projector clicking ]

>> will you be sweet to me?

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[ audience booing, shouting ]

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[ boink! ]

will you kiss my cheeks?

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Will you give me treats?

>> [ munches ]

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Blech!

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[ glass shatters ]

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Will  you be sweet to me?

[ both scream ]

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>> all: Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

Wee-ooo! Wee-ooo!

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>> [ screaming ]

>> [ growling ]

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>> agh!

[ moans ]

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[ shouting indistinctly ]

[ glass shatters ]

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>> look what you've done, lsp.

>> huh?

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>> you made it gross.

Everything you touch turns

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Gross!

>> uh...

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>> just like you!

>> aah!

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>> you don't really think you

deserved  any of this, do you?

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>> you're a rat, just a giant

rat that wandered into

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Somebody's  nice house.

>> I'm a good person!

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I take care of babies!

[ grunts ]

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Look!

[ crickets chirping ]

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Baby sweet p?

[ echoing ] baby sweet p!

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Oh, my glob, I lost the baby!

I lost the baby!

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[ crying ] I'm a bad person!

>> [ chuckles evilly ]

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Just accept that you're garbage!

>> hi-yah!

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Baby sweet p!

Have you seen a big, fat child

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Around here?!

Have you seen my enormous baby?!

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[ crying ]

if only I'd cooked the pizza!

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[ both munching ]

I could've eaten some, too!

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I'm so stupid!

You got to help me!

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I lost some old couple's baby

'cause I didn't do the sweet

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Things!

I just wanted a bubble bath,

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And...

How did I lose something so

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Bi-I-I-I-g?!

[ sputtering ]

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>> ma'am, you're gonna have to

come with us.

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>> baby sweet p!

Give me that donut!

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>> no!

[ cricket chirping ]

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>> I'm not a bad person!

I'm not a bad person!

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>> [ crying ]

>> huh?

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>> [ crying continues ]

>> hey, big baby!

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[ all warbling ]

>> [ crying ]

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>> I found you!

>> [ whimpers ] lsp!

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>> sweet p!

I'm so sorry!

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I should've been sweet to you!

Here, okay, um...

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Pat very gently on the head...

Kiss on both cheeks...

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Mwah! Mwah!

Treat.

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>> mmm! [ munching ]

>> uh, and sing something sweet.

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[ inhales deeply ]

‚ô™ butter cakes, cupcakes, and

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Ice-cream cakes ‚ô™

‚ô™ small baby bums and the

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Friendship of puppies ‚ô™

[ thinking ] you are more

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Precious than anything in this

world, and I will always, always

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Love you.

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Aww!

[ door creaks open ]

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>> we're ho-o-me!

>> shh!

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He's asleep.

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>> why is sweet p's blanket on

the wall --

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>> shh!

Mr. And mrs. Pig trunks, I have

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Some good news.

Sweet p has grown  so attached to

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Me that it would be cruel for me

to leave him, obviously.

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So...

Yes, I will accept the position

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As your live-in nanny!

[ crickets chirping ]

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[ sighs ]

>> [ croaking ]

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>> huh?

>> partake of the chicken.

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[ munching ]

>>  chicken...

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[ munching ]

[ crying ]

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[ both munching ]

this is good chicken!

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>> maybe we can get, uh, neptr

to sit.

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I don't know.

>> mama?

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I had that dream again -- the

one where I'm a comet boy.

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>> oh, really?

>> yeah, coming back to ooo over

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And over, and there was a fake

comet, a beard man in a

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Spaceship.

>> my, what an imagination...

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>> the comet...

Approacheth.

[ comet rushing ]