The Mumbling Man

The Mumbling Man is a scrapped episode outline for Adventure Time, which was never produced into a full episode.

Synopsis
Finn tries to teach people not to be prejudiced, but in the process learns that he's prejudiced himself.

Story
ACT 1

A tall, thin stranger wanders into a puritan-like town. He acts very strangely-- ignoring people's greetings, speaking in a weird musical language (similar to Kurt Schwitter's "sound poetry"), and moving in a weird twitchy way (like "krumping"). Nobody likes him, except for the children, who follow him around the park. They are mysteriously drawn to him; they seem to dig his crazy style, and are entranced by his wacky movements.

The parents grow suspicious of the stranger's influence. They inform the town elders.

Meanwhile, Finn and Jake happen to be in town having just whitewashed the fences around the park. They see the children gathered around the stranger and investigate. They like his weird style too -- it's like some sort of new dance! And anybody who dances THAT funny is A-OK in their book.

But the elders are angered by this new trend! They don't understand his language and they don't like his Elvis-esque gyrations! The eldest elder, Eldo, calls the town guards to seize the "Mumbling Man," and put him in jail. Finn & Jake leap in front of the advancing guards. "Stop!"

Finn tries to convince the elders to accept the stranger even though he's different, comparing the stranger to a "new coat of paint." Eldo will not accept this. He is blind with rage that Finn is protecting this reprobate and demands that anyone in league with the Mumbling Man must leave the town at once! But the other elders don't agree with Eldo - they are won over by Finn's heartfelt speech. They drag Eldo back home as he shouts threats and warnings. "You have cursed our children! You have cursed our Town! You shall rue the day you ignored Eldo!" The children are left to watch the stranger dance and chant all night long.

But the next day, the children and the stranger have disappeared mysteriously! Eldo reminds everyone that he TOLD them the Mumbling Man would kidnap the children. Finn & Jake are beset by the town guard and arrested for aiding in the abduction!

ACT II

Finn and Jake are thrown in jail. Finn is shocked. He refuses to believe it's the stranger's fault. Finn suspects the curmudgeonly Eldo of a frameup. Jake totally agrees. "That guy's got a big hair between his toes, if you know what I mean." Finn totally knows what Jake means, so they decide to bust out of jail and expose Eldo as a fraud.

Finn distracts the guards while Jake uses his arm power to get the keys. They wait until the coast is clear, and escape into an alleyway at nightfall.

As they sneak through town, passing through the park, Jake picks up the scent of the children. They follow it to PROVE that Finn's trust in the Mumbling Man is well-founded, and that Eldo himself has hidden the children.

Finn and Jake follow the trail over hill and dale, and arrive at a creepy old watermill. Finn and Jake slowly open the creaking door and see an astounding sight!

The Mumbling Man DOES have the children, and he's making them sit in mixing bowls and colanders (which are hanging from the ceiling) and eat salt out of old shoes! The mill looks like a crazed Piranesi prison etching. Meanwhile, the Mumbling Man is dressed in a fish-skirt giving an unintelligible lecture (he's drawing pictures on the walls and floors of the water mill) about chemical compounds and egg-smithing. OMG, this guy IS nuts!

Accepting his poor judgement in trusting strangers, Finn (and Jake) bust in and break up the weird party. The stranger fights back using his knees and elbows. His erratic, convulsive movements make him a tough target to punch for Finn and Jake.

As Finn battles the stranger, the children twist and shake all over the place. They dance towards the bread oven, wriggle into the hopper and tumble onto the grindstone. Jake has to stop them from getting pulverized. His arms, ears, and jowls shoot out in every direction to catch them up.

ACT III

Finally Finn tackles the stranger and pins him down. The children stop twitching. The stranger opens his eyes and reveals that his previous eyes were actually just painted eyelids. The stranger was sleepwalking the whole time! He has no idea what's going on-- he's just a common baker, and the last thing he remembers was falling asleep at his bakery. . . 10 years ago!

Meanwhile, Jake's all out of shape from getting caught up in the mill's gear works. The baker is kindly kneading him back into shape when, suddenly, they notice one of the children is still dangling from a high beam in the mill! As the child falls, the baker uses his pizza tossing ability to expand Jake and toss him right below the descending child. The baker has saved the day! Hurray!

They lead the children back to town and explain what happened. The baker apologizes for acting so weird, and says he'll bake them all free cookies and cakes. All the elders, besides Eldo, accept his apology. As the children are embraced by the townspeople, Eldo secretly thanks Finn for saving the day. "Always stand up for what you believe in, Finn. That's what I'VE always done." Finn frowns.

Looks like everything is back to normal... the only problem is... the kids still dig the stranger's weird style. They won't stop twitching and mumbling like him. Oh well. When in Rome. Everybody gets wiggly (except for Eldo... and the baker).

THE END

Characters

 * Finn
 * Jake
 * Mumbling man
 * Children
 * Town elders
 * Eldo