User blog:Kite13/My adventure time log chapter 5

Chapter 5:

Another way: Finn and Jake were put into bed rest because they willingly jumped off of a giant airborne bird and breaking their foot (their toes in their case, potato potahto, you decide) and Jake hired some clown nurses, which are kinda creepy and disturbing. Though Jake enjoys it very much and Finn hates being smothered that way. As Finn looks through the Enchiridion (haven't seen that in a while folks) and finds a chapter on a cyclops that has tears with magical healing properties, but one of the clown nurses took his book and told him that he should leave the medical professions to the medical professionals (pft if your professionals then I think the ice king is a sexy and macho supermodel |:/). Then one of the clown nurses started kissing Finn's broken toe, though Finn didn't think that was cool so he tried pushing away, but a couple more clown nurses came over and pinned Finn down so the other one could kiss his toe, then finn started screaming and then he fainted and having a clown nurse nightmare  (I can totally relate to Finn because I hate clowns and their creepy faces, it just gives me the willies thinking about them getting all up in my face and thinking their so funny when they freak people out in reality. Yeash (I:-{=     ). After that dream, Finn woke up and ran out as much as his legs can carry him to the forest (forest O faces as I like to call it, you decide). He comes across two paths and a talking tree stump with a dual road arrow on it.  The stump explained that there are two choices, smelly path makes you smelly forever, and hair fall-off path makes your hair fall out forever. It continued to say "choosing is the only way!" and Finn had that same vision of a clown nurse saying "its the only way" and started to scream. He then kicks off the stumps sign and shouted "MY WAY!" and went into the thorn bushes behind the injured stump. Finn then finds himself at a wide river, then he hears a talking bush saying stuff about dummy police and a dummy in his house; then finn asks the talking bush how to get across the river, but the bush told him that it was impossible because the current was so fast it would turn ones butt inside out, and the river is so acidic it would burn your boat in half, and there is a bridge but its a trap, and there are electric eels inside the river; then the bush repeatedly called Finn ugly and stupid (I would have ripped that rude bush apart and find the nearest sharp object and cut him in half and then rub two rock together on it and grind him down then dump him into the river to burn, and said "suck on that you stupid shrub >:P); then Finn had another imager of  that clown nurse and repeatedly said "Glob-It" and yanked that rude bush out of the ground and went into the river and used that bush as a fan to slap the water away from his body. After a few feet, Finn stopped at one of the rocks and rested; the bush, who's now a bunch of branches, still called Finn those rude names and told him to give up, but Finn didn't listen and threw him across the river and just ran the rest of the way screaming. When he came out of the river and back into the woods, he find himself near a short and hairy man-thing with some watermelons (aren't some suppose to be green-peeled not yellow-peeled? And if it was yellow-peeled, should it have a different design on it? :/ weird). The tiny man asked Finn if he could get his wheel down from the tree (ok, how the heck did he get that wheel up there?/:\), he had to get the melons back to his wife Rainy. Finn was still a little bit crazy angry and instead of getting the wheel, he tossed the melons down to the hill, at the bottom was a TP tent and that hairy mans wife Rainy; he tried to warn his wife to watch out, but she only dodged one of the melons and tripped on one and was run over by another and injured her. The hairy man was shocked at Finn and shooed him away and called him a name I forgot. Finn was absolutely disappointed at himself, so disappointed he sang about how he was wrong (he even took off his hat and his hair kinda got linger since Beautopia, and of corse I shouted "GOLDEN LOCKS OF RIGHTEOUSNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!" hey I just like top do that a lot ok :/) after his song (which was auto-tuned like from his baby song [haven't heard that in a while]), he put his hat back on a walked away. But little did he know, the cliff he stood on had opened an eyeball; it was the cyclops he was originally looking for. The cyclops knew he was looking for him for his magical tars, but Finn tried to tell him he was but doesn't want it anymore; yet the cyclops thought he was lying just so he can make him cry. The argument went back and forth a couple times then Finn just gave up and just let the Cyclopes do whatever; though that was a bit of a mistake, the Cyclopes gives Finn a giant knuckle sandwich and left a giant fist shaped crater with Finn in it and demanded Finn to beg for mercy or die. Finn looked closely at the eye of the cyclops and then softly mumbled something the cyclops couldn't understand. Then, when the eye of the giant got close enough, Finn said "I said, MY WAY!" then punched the cyclops in the eye, and tears came falling down onto Finn; and healed him, including his broken foot (toe, potato potahto again you decide). Finn then thought his way could still work, so he decapitated the cyclops and healed Rainy the short hairy mans wife, that rude bush near the river, the talking tree stump, and even a sandwich (which I think was a little bit unnecessary :/). Back at the treehouse, Jake was relaxing on the couch while the clown nurses entertain him and one fat one kisses his broken foot (toe same thing I mentioned a couple times); then Finn barges in with the Cyclopes head; the clown nurses thought he came back for his so called "proper treatment" and called him baby lips (dude he's not a 5 year-old ya crazy red-nosed paper-toothed psycho's), then Finn threw the head and told the clown nurse "kiss that." and of corse she did and the head thought it felt bittersweet. Finn went over to Jake and offered to heal his foot (toe) with his magical goo, but Jake though the kisses worked better; Finn was disgusted  but Jake mentioned "HEY, we all have our own ways." and Finn agreed, then Jake gasped in aw. And so that ends our story, and thanks to the magical tears, Finn  never has to go near those freaky clown nurses ever again; but just to be nice, I'll give this episode 3 and 1/2 stars. So see ya later alligators, this is the part when you type in a while crocodile in the comments, LOL. :)P